D'vorahDavida
Yetzirah

Plot Of The Dog
Fri Feb 17 2006


I let out a long sigh of contentment.

I had reached my destination at last...

I lay right between the two humans, my cold black nose resting on one of their pillows.

Bliss.

Now mind you I WAS invited to the FOOT of the bed earlier. But had surreptitiously inched my way upward until I gained my coveted spot.

My plan worked.

I started out weeks ago waking them up with a lick to the face at about 4 am each morning. Thinking I needed to pee like every weak bladdered female, one of them would get up and let me out into the back yard. Whereupon I dutifully peed and politely came back in and went back to sleep in my doggy bed in the corner of the bedroom.

Then I started stalling about the pee part. I dithered. I posed. I sniffed the air.

Then I deigned to pee at all. But woke them up again 15 minutes later, and peed then.

Next I didn't pee at all. Three times in a row. It was beautiful. They got up and let me out just like an automatic door at Safeway.

Then one morning I waited until the sun had come up on a weekend. After the lick in the face, I put my front feet on the bed and made doe eyes at them that what I really wanted was to join them in the sanctum sanctorium of the pack leader's den.

They let me up. I was adorable about it. I fawned over them.

But they declared I was something of a "moose" and a "bed hog" whatever that means and made me get down. But it was time to get up anyway, so they didn't think much about their decision.

Last night I decided to make my move. The alpha male had been out very late at work. The alpha female got up in the dead of night and seemed to be in some sort of distress. She stayed awake for well over an hour. When the male got home, they both went to bed. I bided my time.

Then when dawn was just thinking about breaking I did the old lick the hand maneuver. The male was out cold. But the female woke up. I knew she didn't want to get out of bed and sure enough, she threw back the down comforter at the foot of the bed and said "Up." in a bleary voice. I jumped up and stayed quietly down there until they were both dead to the world again.

That's when I started my belly crawl to Nirvana.

These humans.

So gullible.

Am I good or what?

[album 65561 Pink divider.gif]




13 Comments
  • From:
    Allimom (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Feb 17 2006
    What is it about the smaller dogs that make them such big bed hogs? Shelby takes up more space than Indigo!
    Alli
  • From:
    Dustbunny3 (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Feb 17 2006
    Not sure where this world is headed. Dogs, Cats and kids only share my bed when invited on rare lazy mornings.
  • From:
    Supertrooper (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Feb 17 2006
    Sunny must have been talking to my two !!
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    PERFECT!! And when we have some time together, you can explain how you did it. I'm finding that I'm SO illiterate when it comes to the internal workings of computers.

    Shabbat Shalom
  • From:
    Welshamethyst (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    Dear Sunny,
    Welcome to the sorority! You've passed the pledge stage and have arrived as a full fledged member of the Bed Hog Sisterhood! Plaque and scroll to follow.

    Sincerely,
    Sister Magpie

    P.S. My human only THINKS she's the alpha, but we know better, now don't we *winks*
  • From:
    InStitches (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    "...I put my front feet on the bed and made doe eyes at them..."

    Clever dog.......one should never under estimate the power of big brown eyes; we humans are suckered by them every time. :)
  • From:
    Welshamethyst (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    You have my very very very most specialest ever promise that I will finish it this weekend and get it sent out. Feel free to beat me with my broom *cowers in the corner*
  • From:
    Parett (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    What a nice Mommy and Daddy. Sunny is one lucky pup.

    Love ya...Parett
  • From:
    ImNotLisa (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    :o) Congratulations Sunny! You now rule the roost, no question about it.
  • From:
    Sezrah (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    i love it :))
  • From:
    Bookworm (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    Lol, thanks for the giggle. ;-)
  • From:
    SerendipityDuck (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Feb 18 2006
    It's all "About the Dog".

    Your post proves that as you slept your dog has been communicating telepathically with you. How wonderful for you that your dog has given you the ablitiy to truly understand him.

    Have a really great day!

    Paula
  • From:
    Welshamethyst (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Feb 19 2006
    I can totally understand where you're coming from. On the hair front I'm lucky. I found a cut that is great for me (short spikes all over) that I plump up with hair putty). All I do is get out of the shower, towel it off, apply the chunky product and go. Blonde highlights don't hurt *grins*

    I didn't realise that you were short, too. I'm 5 foot nothing *sigh*. Clothes are hard to find as you well know. I am "solidly built" so that's an extra burden. "Womens" clothes are great except that to get the bum to fit the waist usually comes to my armpits. Petites help some but not as much as I'd like.

    Talk to your Mom-In-Law about the make-up thing. Concentrate on the foundation and go from there.

    Thanks for reminding me I'm not the only one in this boat!

    Hugs