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Yetzirah

True Depressions
Sun Jan 04 2009


As I stare at this blank white computer screen, and the way it taunts me to write something worth reading, I realize that all of us bloggers have become to varying degrees, authors of stories that one might have found in those magazines of long ago.... True Confessions. Does anyone remember those?

[album 65561 trueconfessionsgirlprice-230x300.jpg]

Of course we choose how much or little to divulge of our really real lives and today I had a big choice to make.

I wasn't sure I was going to share this with you because I was afraid that some of you might not understand our actions. Then I decided to trust you to be able to deal with the unpleasant details. You are a decent lot. I figure you can handle it.

Bandit has been put down.

Among his many other issues, as he got more comfortable in our house, he also began to show more aggression. One day last week he stole a half loaf of bread from the counter and ate it in about 5 gulps. I just barely had a chance to snatch the plastic bag away from him, or that would have gone down his gullet too. Then day before yesterday, after being shooed away from a frozen chicken he had gotten ahold of, he turned around and showed me his teeth. When our Sheltie Rescue director heard that, I'm afraid his fate was sealed. We cannot in good conscience send him on to anyone with this kind of deep seated behavior.

I dropped him off to her in the parking lot of the vet about 2 hours ago. I didn't go in with her. I headed off to the grocery store to get a few things and ended up wandering aimlessly up and down the aisles. I needed dog food. I found it and then walked around looking at this and that, called Hub Man to see if he wanted anything and was told to look for Grains of Paradise whatever that is .... They didn't have any. I looked at Jello. I have been craving the stuff lately. I bought a box of a new flavor. Blackbery/Raspberry. I saw a bunch of bananas. I picked them up. I was pathetic really. Nothing looked good to eat. I wasn't hungry, but I was thirsty so bought a little bottle of 'Naked' berry drink. I poked at some smoked salmon. Decided it was too squishy for my taste. I looked at everything in the store. Then I left.

I feel like crap.

And that's my true confession for today.















10 Comments
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jan 04 2009
    Even knowing ahead of time that the possibility existed, it's still hard when an animal has to be euthanized--for whatever reason. I'm sorry you're feeling so down, but I understand it, too.

    I'm just glad Bandit only showed his teeth at you instead of actually biting you. You did a heroic job of trying to turn around his bad behavior.

    I'm sending you "chirk up" thoughts.


    Bless
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jan 04 2009
    PS: My mother-in-law thought all those stories were really true about real people. She was addict4ed to soap operas too.


    Bless
  • From:
    ImNotLisa (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    I know exactly how you feel. When I was 20 or so my folks had a cocker spaniel that behaved in a very similar manner. Not well and possibly surpassing the aggression that Bandit was starting to show. My mother still says she used to worry about coming home from work to find my father or I soaked in blood because of the dog. Eventually we got brave enough to put it down too. A very hard thing to do, but we knew that we could not manage it any longer, nor could we avoid being seriously hurt much longer either. It couldn't possibly go to another family. The point is, of course, that sometimes, despite all your best intentions and love there is nothing you can do to fix what is broken. You didn't hurt Bandit any more than we ever hurt Suzy. Some animals just can't connect with their people, and if you care for them you have to make very difficult decisions. In the end, you saved Bandit from a probable abusive situation if you had let him go on to a home that could not deal with him. It was for the best for all of you. *hugs*
  • From:
    SummerPlace (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    I'm really sorry, Yetzirah. (((((hugs)))))
  • From:
    Salted (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    I'm so very sorry!!!!! You know the vet once told me dogs are like people...we have paranoid people, mistrusting people, sad, mad, people people with mental disorders and it is the same way with dogs. He just never realized this might be a start to a new life for him and could not let go of his old defenses. It is surely a shame but he is fine now on the other side of the rainbow bridge ((( consoling hugs)))
  • From:
    Mamallama (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    Big comforting hugs Sis.
    Love, Tiggs
  • From:
    Nibbles (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    I agree that vicious dogs need to be put down. I'm sorry that you got stuck with one though.

    You've had lots of dogs turn out great though, don't forget that.
  • From:
    Allimom (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    I'm so sorry you had to go through that.
    Alli
  • From:
    404Error (Legacy)
    On:
    Mon Jan 05 2009
    I'm so very sorry. You can take heart in knowing that you gave him the best part of his life. At least that's how I comfort myself when I have similar situations.

    (((hugs)))
  • From:
    Diane (Unauthenticated) (Legacy)
    On:
    Wed Jan 07 2009
    I do remember True Confessions! What a trip. I am sorry that you had to go through all of this Big hugs!