Damn I didn't think things could get this bad this fast. First was the C I ended up getting in Statistics. Somehow, I got a 124 when I needed a 134. I was very devastated. I studied hard for that class and thought I had done really well on the final. What makes this bad is that it knocks me out of contention for UC Davis. I took this very hard and was nearly crying the rest of the day. I tried to talk to the professor afterwards but he said he don't discuss grades once thier in the computer. So those measly 10 points could severely screw me up. Though in a strange twist, I'm in contention for UCLA, if barely. I'm doing good in the classes they require. Still, chances aren't that good.

That was on Thursday. Friday was all about arguing. Me and Michelle were 99% over. She called her parents and told them to pick her up and all that. The reason: I had took $10 out of wallet. Ok, here's the reason. My mom needed it to get stuff at the store and been bugging for her rent money. All we needed to give was $5 more. So when my mom asked if she could get that 5 and borrow 5, I decided to get it over with. I ask Michelle if we have it and she says no. So I decide that I don't want to hear my mom nag any more so I looked in her purse. Lo and behold she had exactly $10 in there. So I grabbed it and she told me if I did that it'd be trouble. Though I didn't really care being that it is "our" money. That is why we deposit it in one account and everything. ANyways, that is the main thing. Though she says me not being able to go to Davis and my life was stressing her out. The fight ended when I just broke down. I just couldn't handle all this coming at me. She felt bad for me and stayed......

So by the weekend things cooled off. It seemed like things might settle down. Then, today *Monday* I find out that we are being thrown out of our place. The owner says "My mom's husband died and she needs the place". She wants to move her mom in by September 1st. So its not an eviction, but it sure feels like it. It's really unfortunate that my mom didn't have the business sense to sign a lease. So now my mom has no job and has to move. She says she literally has 7 cents in her account. While she is telling me, I'm thinking *this is a devastating*. She says that if she finds a place, we CAN'T come. Even though I have no job and not much money. Doesn't matter to her, I'm "old". So my choices are, try really hard to get alex to roomate with me. I could try to get my own place. Or I could use the money I have for a deposit and stuff to help my mom move and then hope it'll be worth it in the long run. And ofcourse, I got to find a job pronto.

The rest of today I was very stressed. Michelle yelled at me because "she was hot" and I don't have air conditioning in my house. Nor do I have a fan. We ended up buying one at home depot for $9. I also talked to a former math instructor. He shares the office with my Stats professor and says that he is very unyielding. He told me the best approach would be to ask him to regrade the final. Otherwise, he won't change the grade, he'll just say "GET OUT".

I really dispise some professors. They are so cold and uncaring. They're just in it for the money. Maybe some prestige and leisure work. They could care less if your life is miserable because of them taking a hard stand on thier grading policy. I have 79.25% and only need an 80% to get a B. This hurts me finacially and emotionally. You know I"m thinking I HATE EM I HATE EM I HATE EM! Plus what hurt even more is that Michelle has bragged about her A in Stats AND teased me about not making it to Davis while she was mad at me. That is such a low blow. Sometimes I wonder why I stick with her. The commentors are right when they say I could find someone better.

I guess the main problem is that it would take a long time for me to "find someone better". She has stuck her when most girls would've ran away. How many women would stay with a guy who lives at home with his mom, lives in the worst part of the ghetto, takes busess everywhere and doesn't even have a job right now. Would you?! Plus my mom insults her just for being asian. As does the rest of the family. I'm not really that attractive. I'm not that funny. I got those crazy "things" I'm into. And there is the fact that I got a brain tumor. Girls don't find that as a turn on, trust me. Finally, I"m almost 23, but I look 15. What 20+ year old woman wants to look like they're dating a sophomore in high school?

She isn't that bad, she is silly. She is not that judgemental. Very trustworthy. Very affectionate at times. We both like to think deeply about social issues. She has helped me acedemically and finacially.

Besides all that, I'm still pretty depressed. I seen Bobby and Lihn today while at the college. They wanted to talk to me and I told them "Not right now, I'm not in the mood for it". Bobby asked, "Is it me"? I said, "No, just my life". He then continued to help Lihn; which is weird. How does he know Lihn? I guess I'll find that out later.

Got to talk to Alex. Hope he can help me, since shit hit the fan and its gettinga all over me. If he declines, it'll hurt, but I'll still be his friend. At times like these, I wish I had other relatives like uncles and aunts. Maybe a cousin or something. Maybe this would be a good time to look for my dad. Maybe he is making it and can share the wealth. Though for those in the know, remember that he was a crack head the last time I seen/heard him. Well, that's all, I'm going to keep myself from rambling. I'm going to lay on the bed and think *stress* now. Nite.