When I say no period, I'm talking of Michelle's period. It's late. Very late. She typically has it on the 22nd. It is now the second. I am nervous.

We bought a pregnacy test a couple days ago. She is hesitate to take it. I am anxious for her to take it. I want to know what is going on so we can plan for what is next. If she's not, it's all good. We know to be even more cautious. If she is.....Well......I hate to say or type this but,.........she's gonna abort it. It's her decision. We already discussed the what if. As much as I morally think it is a wrong, I'm not gonna stop her from doing it. It is her body. I also believe in her logic. We can't afford a baby. PERIOD. Finacially, emotionally, time-wise. Heck, we can barely make it on our own as it is. *sigh* I hope she's just not because this is really backing me into a position I'm not really wanting to be in.

We're so stupid. I can't believe us. Especially myself. I know better than to be so irresponsible. I should've went about the whole sex issue differently. I let the situation take control of me instead of vice versa.

Such a downer that is that I'm gonna change gears and talk about the last 2 days. They've been downward spirals for Michelle. Most of that is due to hormones we think. She's been so down. *body changing due to pregnancy?* Yesterday I managed to bring her up because I was being extra romantic and doing EVERYTHING for her. She appreciated my extra effort. Today wasn't so great. Down again, I couldn't handle her unhappiness. I resorted to playing video games while she studied history. She was sick before that. Seen yellow spots in the shower, had to sit. OTher than that, today was marked with heavy eating on her part and grumpiness. *more signs?* We attended class and then came home.

Here at home, she was in a better mood. We talked and I tried to get her to take the preg. test at that moment. She refused. She went to sleep. I read some sports stuff and then type this. Now i'm sitting here wondering what's next. I dunno. I'm frustrated. ~END~