There are alot of blurred lines in my life. Whether it's how I view the world, christ, or myself. I thought I generally knew everything I needed to know. I guess I don't. I don't know if this is a good thing or bad thing but I don't like it. I used "know" God created the world in 6 days and rested on the seventh. Now, I am starting to question my "logic". Is this "the devil", or is it my reasoning abilities developing. Half of me says it Satan tainting my mind, the other half says, I only know what has been empirically proven. Well Jesus was empirically proven. But, was he really the son of God, or just another one of those like Muhammand that think they were someone they weren't.
I don't even want to think about all that. I can barely figure myself out. Am I the sensitive shy guy or the uncaring assertive guy. Do I want to give love or get love? Do I want to follow God or myself? Do I want fries with that? Paper or Plastic? White or Wheat? Lots of freakin questions. It's really confusing for me. I feel like I'm at a turning point. I want to ask for directions but I'm a guy. You know us guys don't like asking for directions. *jk, I hate sterotype logic* Seriously, like I said previously, I want someone to say, go that way, and just go that way. Though I feel like I am required to find my own path. I want to follow God and let that be that, it's just..... I want my cake and not have to worry about the fat grams. I just don't have much faith at this point, which has always been my problem. Somewhere buryed in my comments I probaly have a comment about having faith. Anyways, I feel scared to be a christian now. It takes away alot of things I want in life. I would also have to change who I am because of it. Those things, a certain thing in paticular, will be very hard to change. Well, I have EVIL math class. I gtg. Thanks for your time. OR not. Heh, another contradiction. I want people to read this, yet I want it private. Other than Michelle, people are VERY judgemental. I couldn't take that, although in real life, it'd appear that I can handle criticism. That is all. I miss typing and chatting and stuff. If only I had the time and connection at home.....~END~
Comments (1)
Lines: There will always be blurred lines until the last days when God reveals all truth.
Questions: Like the lines, they will always be there. It's what makes life interesting. Just remember you don't have to have all of the answers now. It's part of a process, and it's supposed to last a lifetime.
Logic: The question isn't always Is this logical?, but instead Who's logic is being used?
God: Give Him your doubts, He's big enough to handle it.
Jesus: Well, I did find out that Jesus' miracles were not just recorded in the bible. Other writings have been found that talk about the amazing stuff he did. Word traveled slowly back then, but it did travel, and people heard about this amazing guy who did amazing things. Just as a comparison, did you know that the only original that ever existed to prove Alexander the Great existed doesn't exist anymore? No one knows what happened to it, or even if it ever did exist.
Time: School always takes up lots of time. We miss you too, but school is important right now.
Christianity: You've only talked about the costs of being a Christian. Don't forget the benefits.
Life: It's life. Live it. The only really big mistake anyone can make is giving up.
Glad to see you haven't given up yet. Stop by when you can. We'll wait. :)
>^..^<