I'm scared, but why
Dear Diary,
Today is going like anyday should go like. The lil bro and sis playing with thier toys, my mom watching tv after work, my brother out with some hoochie mama. Yet, I feel like something bad is gonna happen. I don't know why, but I've been on heighten alert. I keep thinking about the saying, the calm before the storm. I should be happy, things are "normal". God answered my prayers, I should be in my room dancing. Man, what's my deal. One side of me keeps telling me, be happy, everythings ok. THe other side is like "If you indulge in this happiness and then something goes wrong, then I'll really get sad" *sigh* well, that's all for now. Hope y'all have a nice day.
Comments (3)
fortune (Legacy)
*sits with you*
I'm sorry you're scared hon. Ican't answer why either. But I hope that you don't have reason to be scared.
*hugs you*
I'm sorry you're scared hon. Ican't answer why either. But I hope that you don't have reason to be scared.
*hugs you*
Honey (Legacy)
Hi tinoz,
Those feelings are very real. It is the devil's way of throwing you off track. The devil does not like it when things goes God's way, so he plants evil thoughts in your mind. When these feeling occure, start praying for God to calm you and tell the devil to get behide you! Amen!
As for today entry in my diary, it was sent to me.
I just put it in my deary. You can copy it and keep it for yourself. I try to put these in every Sunday, to keep the Lord' day Holy. I try not to complain on the Lord's day, I try to make it special for Him.
Tinoz, I ask that you say a pray for me. I will say one for you.
Don't forget to put your request in the upper room!
*Hugs to you*
Honey
Those feelings are very real. It is the devil's way of throwing you off track. The devil does not like it when things goes God's way, so he plants evil thoughts in your mind. When these feeling occure, start praying for God to calm you and tell the devil to get behide you! Amen!
As for today entry in my diary, it was sent to me.
I just put it in my deary. You can copy it and keep it for yourself. I try to put these in every Sunday, to keep the Lord' day Holy. I try not to complain on the Lord's day, I try to make it special for Him.
Tinoz, I ask that you say a pray for me. I will say one for you.
Don't forget to put your request in the upper room!
*Hugs to you*
Honey
janed0e (Legacy)
Hi tinoz -
Ok, yesterday like I said I wrote this long essay lol and lost it. Your story sounds painfully familiar. Being a third parent sucks! My brother and I grew up hating each other because of the responsibility my parents put on me.
(Daddy was a trucker and gone all the time and Mom was chronically depressed and in bed all the time. I changed diapers, cleaned the house, fixed meals - provided there was food in the house - which - usually there wasn't and did the only discipline my brother got, and I will tell you IT SUCKED because I was only ten years old trying to raise a baby and I had no clue - or maturity to know how to do it right. Thank goodness my brother turned out O.K. - I am sooo proud of him.)
Anyway - hang in there, I know you LOVE your siblings, but I also KNOW its VERY hard to LIKE them. You sound like you do occasionally enjoy their company, which is more than I can say for myself.
[Getting choked up because I RESENTED my brother by blaming him for the reason my parents had marital problems and were broke all of the time - Things got SOOO bad after he was born - which would have happened even IF he weren't, but I was so immature .... OH hell, anyway......
What chokes me up the most though, is now my brother and I are VERY close and he told me I was his EVERYTHING and he only wanted to grow up to be like me. And all I did was let him know how much I hated him....]
Anyway, know this - no matter what your siblings say - they adore you even if they don't outwardly show it and KNOW that you have WAY more influence than you think. It's easy to try to only do the parent thing because that is the role your parents passed on to you, but know that you are a big brother FIRST.
- I suggest you read "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" - (or Teens). And I suggest you continue to show your siblings in what ways you LIKE them (they already know you love them) - You have no idea what you can do for their self esteem.
Hang in there! You are gonna make it.
jane.
P.S. As far as peace before the storm - sometimes its just a melancholoy mood - sometimes its intuition, in either case I reccommend re-reading a book that has inspired you in the past or movie --- or pick up a book which someone has recommended -- like the Seven Habits (hint, hint).
Ok, yesterday like I said I wrote this long essay lol and lost it. Your story sounds painfully familiar. Being a third parent sucks! My brother and I grew up hating each other because of the responsibility my parents put on me.
(Daddy was a trucker and gone all the time and Mom was chronically depressed and in bed all the time. I changed diapers, cleaned the house, fixed meals - provided there was food in the house - which - usually there wasn't and did the only discipline my brother got, and I will tell you IT SUCKED because I was only ten years old trying to raise a baby and I had no clue - or maturity to know how to do it right. Thank goodness my brother turned out O.K. - I am sooo proud of him.)
Anyway - hang in there, I know you LOVE your siblings, but I also KNOW its VERY hard to LIKE them. You sound like you do occasionally enjoy their company, which is more than I can say for myself.
[Getting choked up because I RESENTED my brother by blaming him for the reason my parents had marital problems and were broke all of the time - Things got SOOO bad after he was born - which would have happened even IF he weren't, but I was so immature .... OH hell, anyway......
What chokes me up the most though, is now my brother and I are VERY close and he told me I was his EVERYTHING and he only wanted to grow up to be like me. And all I did was let him know how much I hated him....]
Anyway, know this - no matter what your siblings say - they adore you even if they don't outwardly show it and KNOW that you have WAY more influence than you think. It's easy to try to only do the parent thing because that is the role your parents passed on to you, but know that you are a big brother FIRST.
- I suggest you read "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" - (or Teens). And I suggest you continue to show your siblings in what ways you LIKE them (they already know you love them) - You have no idea what you can do for their self esteem.
Hang in there! You are gonna make it.
jane.
P.S. As far as peace before the storm - sometimes its just a melancholoy mood - sometimes its intuition, in either case I reccommend re-reading a book that has inspired you in the past or movie --- or pick up a book which someone has recommended -- like the Seven Habits (hint, hint).
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