To forgive or not to forgive, THAT is the question!

Last night, me and Michelle had a good talk about our feelings about our parents. I thought it was interesting in that Michelle wants to try to talk as just a person to her parents one-on-one in hopes that they can just get along. It sounds odd if you and your family always talks. But if you're familiar with me and Michelle's situation at all, you know that our parents have done a lot of wrong things and don't do a lot of talking to us.

I guess the think that struck me was her ease of forgiveness that she has for them versus how I am fairly more reluctant to do so. I think I realize that I haven't really forgiven my mom. It sounds easy. Just do it. Its the right thing to do. I know. But what if someone doesn't even think they've done anything wrong even when you point out to them that their actions have hurt you? I think I'm ok with the situation, but I wonder if my mom is. And to me, forgiveness isn't just a word you say to someone. Forgiveness involves action. So yeah... I dunno. When I ask Michelle whether I should forgive my mom, she says, "I'm too biased to answer that question. I don't believe parents should ever throw out their children. Plus, with the way she treated me and all, I dunno" Yeah....she was fairly rude to Michelle. She used to call her an immigrant, among other things and accused her of dating me because she had no place to stay. *funny thing, my mom is an immigrant* Ironic, don't you think?

I can see myself eventually forgiving her, but not my older brother. He has done far worse with no sign of guilt or any type of remorse. He'd really have to come to my house one day and ask with a sincerity that I don't think exsists in him. With the amount of pride he has, I don't ever see that happening. Well, atleast till its really too late, which it just about is. I see it happening during a midlife crisis. That won't be for another 15 years or so. Anyways...

Besides that, life has been dull. I need to get out the house more. Actually, I just need to hang out with someone. Maybe I'll call Ray. If I can find his number. We always have stimulating talks. Besides, I just can't get into online chats anymore. Either the person is restrained in expressing their self, or they are so lost that they're bleeding from all sides and they just don't have the capacity to "get it". And no, its not everyone, but that is what happens when you get online at oddball times. Rarely, do you see the ones that have a nice balance. Anyways, I'm way off topic. That's all.

Comments (5)

bouncing (Legacy)

Only you can decide if and when you can forgive your Mum. Not really someone else can really decide.
The fact you're even thinking about it would suggest you will one day though.
Hope you sort out what you want to do though :)

OnTheWingsofanAngel (Legacy)

Hope you can forgive people when they say things that might be hurtful. You never know what can happen from one day to the next. I understand your frustration about it all though and hopefully it dims as time goes on. I don't know where u went when I switched puters but I might call u tonight to check up on you. At any rate, I hope ur ok.

*hugs*
Kit Kats

salted (Legacy)

You know it's entirely possible to love someone but not like them!!!! One thing does not neccessitate the other. Just because people are related to you does not mean you have to be all lovey dovey with them as long as you have an understanding. If it troubles You that things have been left badly or blowin in the wind, have your say, no matter their attitude, know you did the right thing and leave it at that! The rest is up to them. Everyone makes mistakes. just because your title is mother or brother or son or whatever does not change your ability to screw up. It's if they are sorry for their past treatment or not that is the true test. To error is human to forgive Divine...put it to rest in your mind! (hugs)

salted (Legacy)

I am current;ly in a morals war with a a very loose woman calling herself DT MOM. the things she writes are disgraceful. She could make her diary a adult only or afriends only but won't cuz she lives for the "hits" checks them constantly and lives in fear of falling off the top ten list! i mostly just repeated her own words in my rant but she took offence lol. she calijms you can hit any 10 of her pages randomly AND NOT GET SEX THINGS i FOUND THE FIRST 3 RANDOM ONES TERRIBLE! so she must have hand picked her ten lol. i realize she is s sick person but I just couldn't keep my big mouth shut cuz I fear for her 3 children (hugs )

kaliko88 (Legacy)

A lot of people really don't get forgiveness. I can't say that I know the answer to it either, but I know what the answer is for me.

It's kinda long, so I think I'll put it up in a diary entry. Come look if you want.

>^..^<