When I was a die hard christian, I used to think that people asking for help was my chance to do God's will and assist them. Though, as time goes by, I'm starting to not feel that is what God would want or what is best for them. Most of them do this for a living. Nice people help them be maladaptive by encouraging them. Though what even steams me more are people who try to strike up a friendly conversation and then lay out that they want something. Most of these people aren't panhandlers but hustlers. You know they're not homeless because thier clothes aren't really dirty or smelly. Though its hard to distinguish them from those that really do need help.

That is the tough part, figuring out who is real and who is trying to use me for whatever they can get. It's like part of me says "what if that was me". THe other part says " I can't fix the world, that's their freakin ploblem, not mines".

I think from now on I'm only going to help people that are either from college or people I know. The rest will just have to find another sap they can get what they want.

I guess what provocted all this is this lady that was talking to me at the bus stop. SHe told me and Michelle that she needed $.50 and was short on the bus. I was going to pull it out but then thought, what if she is hustling me. So I wait for the bus to come. SHe then puts the money in her hand she has and some more from her purse. Also, there have been alot of cases like that, where people ask me for something, then if i don't give in, they find a way around thier situation. Anyways, I'm still not sure how I should really go about all this.

Oh, one good thing did happen. I found 2 books I've been looking for. The ones kaliko sent me. I have began to read with Michelle, "a case for faith". Michelle thinks its better than she expected and it has helped me with some of my questions about christianity.