It's almost time to move again. Shit. I was just getting used to the area and bus schedules. However, this should be the last time we have to move. I don't plan on jumping around much longer. I hope we can find a place that is available immediately. We do have the paper and a list. The list came from Alex's stepmom. *Oh, how freakin sweet of her* I know she has been gossiping about the whole thing. A lot of Alex's relatives are calling him about the whole situation, even though he didn't tell them. The latest was his grandma. She has a whole different spin on this. She thinks it'd be best if I stayed with Alex. The reason: I cook, clean, take out the trash and pick stuff up for him at the store. Not to mention that he will probaly be lonely when I'm gone. Though Alex says that he wants to be on his own and that he could take care of stuff for himself. Honestly, I don't think he can. The dumpster is too high for him. How can he carry groceries while using a manual wheelchair? He only knows how to cook microwaveable stuff. He isn't even able to pay off everything without his mom, dad, and grandma watching over everything. Though I do understand he wants his independance. Besides, I don't enjoy sleeping on the floor and having to listen to whatever he wants.

Last night, I was crying while I was lying down. There is so much I have to do and I'm worried. I have to go to the dentist and fix my breaking braces. I haven't went back to the doctors about updating my status on the tumor. Got to pay PG&E *gas* soon. Got stressful classes. Relationship is going way downhill. Hope I get an affordable place in a decent area that is close to the college. And ofcourse, need a job.

Right now I'm biting my toungue so I don't get all emotional. That usually works for me. At worse, there is always the bathroom.

In odd news, my brother Ricky got me a gamecube as a late birthday gift. I don't know what he is up to. Is it a guilty consicous? Is he up to something? Did he steal it like he did something similar? Whatever the case, he got me it. Funny, I don't even have a TV. My last one broke when I was living with my mom. What really would've worked is money. He knows that. He knows I was staying in a motel and now at Alex's. Do I really need a gamecube?!!! Maybe I'll sell it myself. It's new and is in a metroid prime box. The cube itself is platnium. Anyways, after he gave to me he said he loved me. I told him I like him slightly more, but that's it. I'm thinking *and Michelle pointed this out too* that if he really cared, I'd be staying at his new place that *funny enough* has an extra room. *just in case he wants a roomate* Though that would be asking WAY too much of him. Rick actually giving me a valuable without me paying is enough of a stretch for him. Wouldn't want to live with his psycho ass anyways, but the thought that he offered would make me feel slightly better.

I guess having college is a good thing. Makes me focus on other stuff besides the problems I got. That's all for now.