Ok, today I woke up really tired, guess I shouldn't stay up to 4 AM trying to talk about my beliefs. Anyways, so I get up and call my endocrinologist. I leave a message. Later, her nurse like called. Asked me to tell her my concerns. For some reason, I didn't feel comfortable telling some nurse. ANyways, she says my doc will call me on Monday. *she better or I'll make my complaints heard* I have lots of questions on side effect. I really want to know this stuff, and she has kinda being like igoring my messages. First time I spoke to a nurse. Though that is not the reason for my title. Anyways, so I go to the college.
There I have on fav outfit and a nice new haircut. Though I don't feel that good bout myself. I still kinda feel like I'm not as attractive as most. ALL I can see is all my defects. Anyways, I go to student center. There is none of the regulars. But I sit anyways. There, Awilda and her brother are there. *they been coming there of late* Though apparently everyone knows them. Anyways, what has got me a lil down too is fact that I am always ignored or cut off during conversations. LIke I'll talk, then they talk to someone else then I am there just talking while they are talking to them. Eventually I stop, then sometimes they're like, what were you saying. GRRRRr Also, no one ever really comes to see me. Like, some people come in to see if Candace is there. Or if Avina is there. No one ever comes to talk to me. Or I hate it when I'm there alone, then someone comes in, then looks around says, looks like no one is there. THen they leave. I'm THERE!!!! Talk to me.
Not only that, I was just plain feeling down. I just sit there. All by myself. No one to talk to. All of everything just got me all down. Siting there just thinking and thinking. Grrrr. About what, just everything. Like the tumor, no real friends, school, lack of money, etc. I can go on. but you get point. Eventually Jeff and Avina come in. They kinda try to talk to me, but by then, I'm not in mood. I just layed there on couch, really thinking bout stuff. Ya know I almost gave him the address to here. But was ockward how it didn't happen. Eventually I leave all mad just cause was like I didn't feel like being round anyone.
So I go to bus where I see bunch of highschool girls. They are cute, but I can see their immaturity. It so turned me off. Though one frekeled girl was sitting there looking all sad. I think I wrote bout her once. Maybe a few lines. Anyways, I don't know, I just felt really bad for her. I think she noticed me looking at her. She started to like look at me through corner of eye. *how cute* Though she looked too young. So I didn't bother with her. Besides, I like Rebecca. :)
So eventually I make it home. *duh* My lil sis was still happy bout them new hamsters. Did I write her hamster had hamsters. Well it did. 8 of them. Not sure what were gonna do about them. I also found out there is a slumber party this Friday she wants to go to. Though she expressed concern about her not wanting to do anything bad or get ignored. *she is tripping off getting ignored, hmmm, I got to find out about this feeling she referred to briefly* Well, she did admit eventually that her friend wanted to egg houses. Though my sis doubts she will get a bunch of eggs, or her mom will let her out and do that. I said yeah she could go, but I still not sure I want her too. Yet, I don't wanna be controlling. Well, that is all. I got homework then I'll probaly go on my webcam. Or not. Not sure. I will be online to chat, if ya want. Would love someone to im me. ANyone. Ok, now I'm sounding desperate. Maybe I should pray. Think I will. Since depending On online people is not that good of an idea as I've been told in severeal goood comments.