Wow, talk about shopping at the last possible moment. GOt a ride from lil bro's dad and took the kids. *didn't want to shop around with such little time, besides, the rest of the gifts are surprises to them* Were there and there aren't many toys left. We do manage to spend the money I brought though. *while there, got a lil nostolgic, remembered how much I use to look through the toy aisle and hope my mom would buy me a paticular toy* As we were leaving, they turned off the lights.

While in the car, I looked out the window and just tryed to think about what I do have. Seemed that for every positive thing I thought, there was a negative thing. Then, out of nowhere, lil bro's dad asked if i was hungry. I told him yeah. *was very hungry, hadn't eaten all day* He takes me to lil ceasers pizza. We get pizza and crazy bread. I thank him. He says that's my gift. :) After that, go in my room and lay on my bed.

At that point, my emotions were really mixed. The reason, well, was happy I got some gifts. Box of chocolates from mom, the food from lil bro's dad, 3 games from big bro. Jeff is suppose to get me something. Then there's the flip side. No cool christmas dinner. Those aren't that many gifts. No big extended family. The whole day will be just like any other day, with me probaly on the computer all day. I dunno. I should be happy I have a roof over my head, food to eat, clean water, gifts, etc. Just, I guess i take that stuff for granted. I suppose you could call me spoiled. I mean, I know there is worse. Homeless people. People without families, people who lost family members due to 9/11. Some kids in poorer nations won't be getting anything. MOst of them probaly wish for the stuff I already have. I think I keep looking up. Keep looking at what I COULD have, just don't. I also think I'm worried about the fact of returning on campus and then being asked what I got for christmas, and then I tell them I got snacks. That's embarrassing. I may just lie. *sigh* I still have pride. Well, i'm getting off and gonna hang with lil bro and sis. I'm feeling lonely. ~END~