A few things have happened over the last few days. From ups to downs. That's life I guess. Well, here's my story.

First off, alot of work. Not hard or anything, but I just hate working in of itself. I hate being alone for awhile, then when i get used to it, a customer comes by. I then have to fake being happy. Though sometimes it isn't fake, alot of times it is. Well, one things for sure, its given more alot more people skills. I can read people REALLY well now I think. From body language to voice tone, I know if they need help, wanna be left alone or just wanna look for awhile and then ask questions.

As for the rest of my life, its been since Friday since I went to college. I dunno, I just feel uncaring for it right now. Only thing I've actually cared about is probaly Michelle. The more we talk and chat, the more I just want the best for her. Though alot of times I think that she doesn't do a good job comforting me or changing how I feel. I dunno if its because she don't know how to react or its the fact that she just thinking about herself. Hard to REALLY say. Anyways, I know I do love her and she does me.

As for my days, the last two have been spent at Alex's. Was ok over there. We talked and went online. I got him pizza and watched him play mostly video games. I wished he'd watch me, I mean, has it all the time. As for the pizza, I got it for him, though he was more or less non-chalant about it. I personally felt bad for kinda ignoring him while I chatted and talked to michelle. Also, feel kinda mad at self because when I go there, I always talk about how aware of life I am and how I can control certain aspects of things and know what's going on. I think that makes me come off as manipulative to him. THough I generally talk about it because I really don't know what else to talk about. I dunno. I always tell Michelle to open up to people yet I don't take my own advice.

Next part is just for Michelle. If your wondering why I'm not chatting, its because you totally ignored my messages while you were on phone and didn't tell me you were on it till after. All I was looking for was an apology for not telling me and apology for not talking. Also when I said, I was a lil depressed, instead of comforting me, you say, what am I. Then say your a cow girl and start mooing. You totally didn't catch that. That isn't the first time either. It seems to me that whenever I talk about me having a problem, focus goes back to how you have your problems. Then I end up comforting you while I get lil comfort or real interest resolution. All i'm saying is, show some more interest in me when you see me reach out. I don't do it much, but if I do say something like I'm depressed, don't just ask why, then move on or change subject.