This second set contained a duplicate house key, duplicate car ignition key, and MY MAILBOX KEY.

You see why I don't carry all my keys on one key chain?

Saturday night I went to shul to celebrate Erev Simchat Torah. On Sabbaths and other holy days, orthodox Jews don't "carry" anything, so we pin a key to an article of clothing, or devise some other way of allowing ourselves to get back into our homes after the celebration. So on this particular key ring, I had attached a safety pin so I could pin the keys to the hem of my shirt.

This is what I remember: I unpinned the key ring from my shirt, unlocked the door, walked into the house, and then.... What? I don't remember. Usually, I take a few steps to the kitchen and hang up the keys on the key peg, then go do whatever else needs doing.

Not only that...and this is where the gremlins come in...I saw that a small, very heavy ashtray was in smithereens. This is the ashtray that I drop the lighted match into after I've lit my Sabbath candles. Now the ashtray was intact when I left Saturday evening, and I could find no evidence of ANYthing that might have dropped on the ashtray and broken it. Nothing. The pieces, except for a few splinters, were all on the table where I always kept it.

Thinking that I might have gone directly to the living room and sat down (instead of hanging up the keys), I have lifted the cushions of the furniture, tipped over the chairs, looked under tables, cleared all the books off the end table, checked the waste baskets. No keys. I upended my purse, considering the possibility that I put the keys in the purse instead on the peg. No keys. I looked under the bed, considering the possibility that I might have dropped the keys instead of hanging them up in the kitchen. No keys.

Now I know those keys are in this apartment someplace, and it's driving me nuts! Is there anyone out there who is a FINDER? Who can tell me where my keys are???? And HOW DID MY ASHTRAY GET BROKEN?????

AAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!