WARNING!! The following is a graphic description of gastric distress. Continue reading at your own peril!
I can no longer eat what I want and as much as I want. [I think this is going to be a very effective weight loss program.]
There are certain foods that cause almost immediate pain. And not only that, but my abdomen becomes painfully distended, and the colostomy bag threatens to burst like a balloon that's had one breath too many blown into it. I'm moaning and groaning and belching. And the noisiest and longest belch gives the most relief. But it's only temporary. It's like a contest: the most and the noisiest win. I'll enter a burping contest with any pre-teen boy!
Since there's no connection of the bowel to the rectum, I can't get rid of gas by the other end. Most unsatisfactory!!
And then there's the amount of food. A whole lot cheaper than that lap band around the stomach. And probably just as effective. One more bite, and I want to throw up. Doesn't matter what's left on the plate--that last bite of mashed potatoes, that last bite of baked salmon, that bit of salad with my very own ranch dressing--is going down the disposal, not my esophagus. I'm gonna hate that when summer comes with watermelon time. I've been known to do serious damage to a good sized watermelon.
I've just finished a snack of a small patty of mashed potatoes and a couple tablespoons of mixed vegetables. So far the broccoli is behaving.
NOTICE: This next part is G-rated for all readers:
I went to ToastMasters today. I missed last week because I had one of those days when I couldn't wake up until mid-afternoon. I must say we did a good job of pulling together a last-minute program. The president had been away and hadn't had time to put together a "regular" agenda. He suggested a Grab-Bag session, or something else if the members came up with and agreed to a program. We ended up with a round-robin TableTopics. The president picked a person, then posed the first question: What are you going to do in the next 30 days to realize a dream, professional or personal. That person answered, then posed his question to another member. And so it went until everyone had had a chance to speak and pose a question for the next person. My question was: What are you planning for retirement? I could see some wheels turning. This is a young (to my eyes) group, and I'll bet not a one has given any thought to those 24 hours 7 days a week with no office or business to go to. The young man who answered my question confessed that until that point he hadn't even thought about it, except he'd like to retire early and play golf.
Some of you (watersrpite flying comes to mind) will probably never retire in the formal sense of the word. So, I throw out this question to my readers: How are you planning to spend your retirement years?
Bless
I can no longer eat what I want and as much as I want. [I think this is going to be a very effective weight loss program.]
There are certain foods that cause almost immediate pain. And not only that, but my abdomen becomes painfully distended, and the colostomy bag threatens to burst like a balloon that's had one breath too many blown into it. I'm moaning and groaning and belching. And the noisiest and longest belch gives the most relief. But it's only temporary. It's like a contest: the most and the noisiest win. I'll enter a burping contest with any pre-teen boy!
Since there's no connection of the bowel to the rectum, I can't get rid of gas by the other end. Most unsatisfactory!!
And then there's the amount of food. A whole lot cheaper than that lap band around the stomach. And probably just as effective. One more bite, and I want to throw up. Doesn't matter what's left on the plate--that last bite of mashed potatoes, that last bite of baked salmon, that bit of salad with my very own ranch dressing--is going down the disposal, not my esophagus. I'm gonna hate that when summer comes with watermelon time. I've been known to do serious damage to a good sized watermelon.
I've just finished a snack of a small patty of mashed potatoes and a couple tablespoons of mixed vegetables. So far the broccoli is behaving.
NOTICE: This next part is G-rated for all readers:
I went to ToastMasters today. I missed last week because I had one of those days when I couldn't wake up until mid-afternoon. I must say we did a good job of pulling together a last-minute program. The president had been away and hadn't had time to put together a "regular" agenda. He suggested a Grab-Bag session, or something else if the members came up with and agreed to a program. We ended up with a round-robin TableTopics. The president picked a person, then posed the first question: What are you going to do in the next 30 days to realize a dream, professional or personal. That person answered, then posed his question to another member. And so it went until everyone had had a chance to speak and pose a question for the next person. My question was: What are you planning for retirement? I could see some wheels turning. This is a young (to my eyes) group, and I'll bet not a one has given any thought to those 24 hours 7 days a week with no office or business to go to. The young man who answered my question confessed that until that point he hadn't even thought about it, except he'd like to retire early and play golf.
Some of you (watersrpite flying comes to mind) will probably never retire in the formal sense of the word. So, I throw out this question to my readers: How are you planning to spend your retirement years?
Bless