Pragmatist
Pragmatist

I don't really have anything positive to write about.  In fact, I'm miserable.  I have an appointment with my primary physician on Thursday.  

1.  We'll go over my medications and make adjustments.  I'm pretty sure some of the problems I'm dealing with are side effects of medications I've never taken before.

2.  Is a cardiac consult worthwhile?  The vascular surgeon assured me that another aneurysm is not expected.  But what about the atrial fibrillation?   Will that happen again?  What about the pounding heart and breathlessness?

3.  I don't want to wait three months for the general surgeon consult.  My belly hurts--well, it's more discomfort than pain--but I'm not willing to put up with it for another three months!

4.  I'll see the vascular surgeon in three months, and according to the appointment information, I'm to see the general surgeon at the same time.  Nope.  I want to see the general surgeon as soon as we can get an appointment.

5.  I'm nauseated if I don't eat, and I'm nauseated if I do eat.  Besides which, I don't have the energy to cook a meal, so I stick something in the microwave.  And I'm running out of stuff to cook that way.  I did fix some brown rice and tuna today, and it was good.

6.  I haven't been to Shabbat services in so many weeks I can't remember.  I missed the last session of the JLI class, and I've missed every Thursday class since then, too.

7.  Went to the post office today, as I needed some two-cent stamps.  Didn't know the postage rate had gone up, and I really-really needed to get a couple checks in the mail.  Almost passed out walking from the parking lot back to my apartment.

8.  And on the subject of my apartment:  it's a wreck.  A filthy mess, and I can't even get the vacuum cleaner out of the closet.  The kitchen should be condemned!

9.  My back aches.

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OK, something nice happened.  I have a very thoughtful son.  He has a crusty exterior, and one would think he's mad at the world.  But I know better.  He's a marshmallow, and the crust is just protection. 

Anyway...he called me a few days ago and expressed his concern about my health.  Then after we talked about that, he said he was sending something in the mail.  If I couldn't use it, feel free to give it to someone who could.  He said "You'll know what to do."

Two beautiful, carved from olive wood, mezuzah cases came a couple days later.  I was able to peel back the felt on the back of one of them, and there is a scroll inside.  So I have two beautiful  kosher mezuzot.  Now the problem is: do I take down the ones I already have in place and install the new ones?  Or do I give them to someone who doesn't have any--like a friend who is going through the conversion process?

Give them away?  But they're from my darling son.  Or maybe I could give the friend the set I already have and put the new ones up on my doorways.  I shopped carefully until I found a set (a matching pair) that I thought were especially beautiful.  And I already had been given one that I put up on the front door.

I'll think about it tomorrow.

Shalom