Pragmatist
Pragmatist

           GRAHAM RICHARD KNOX

            Born July 18, 1933
            Died June 24, 2007

I went to live with my aunt and her husband, Graham's parents, when he was born.  I was to be big sister, and help Aunt with the new baby.

Honestly, I don't remember being that much help.  I don't remember ever giving him a bottle, much less changing a diaper.  I don't even remember baby sitting until he was much older.

But I do remember sibling squabbles.  I do remember sibling games.  I remember hearing his father reading stories to him.  I was eavesdropping.

As we got older, I remember sharing secrets.  His are safe with me, even now.  Even now, I'm not going to reveal anything.

When Graham went to University of Idaho, I visited him in his fraternity house.  He introduced me to his housemother and brothers as his sister.   We played bridge, and I did a creditable job.  At least, his fraternity brothers didn't witness any reneges or other card-playing faux-pas.  I was visiting my sister and brother-in-law who lived in Moscow, with my second-born.  The first-born was in Emmett with his great aunt and uncle, being treated to all kinds of goodies and a birthday party.

Graham eventually married a lovely lady name of Ann.  They had two children, girls.

Graham always wanted to be a farmer, and when I was visiting in Emmett again, with the two younger children, we visited Graham and Ann on the farm.  Orchard.  Ah, cherries!  Unless you've picked 'em ripe off the tree, you don't know your cherries.

Megan remembers the trip.

As we grew older, we sort of drifted apart, and I'm really sorry about that.  The last time we were together was when I spent a couple days with them and their cats, after Thanksgiving if I recall correctly.  They had moved to Hood River, Oregon by that time.  Graham had gotten tired of losing his shirt every fruit season, because of the iffy weather in Idaho.  He was still in the fruit business, but not as the farmer.

Anyway, the weather was nice until the clouds started coming in.  Snow clouds.  Overnight, 18 inches.  I took pictures.  Graham said it was unusual to have snow that early, and definitely unusual to have that much!

Ann had to take Graham's pickup to get me to Portland to the airplane.  Her low-slung sporty car couldn't make tracks thru the snow to get out of the driveway.  That's the last time we saw each other.

There was some desultory communication after that, and finally an e-mail forward from time to time.  I think the e-mails stopped about the time Graham started feeling poorly.  He was recently diagnosed with lung cancer, a lump (and part of the lung?) removed.  According to Ann, the doctor wasn't giving any hope of his leaving the nursing facility.  But Graham was stubborn. He insisted he was coming home.

I called the nursing facility this morning, but Graham couldn't be wakened. When I called again about noon, Ann answered the phone.  She said Graham was just moments away from the end.  I told her I would hang up and let her be with him.

Ann called this evening, just I was coming to the phone to call her,  to let me know that Graham had passed about 10 minutes after I called.  She wanted my sister's phone number because she had misplaced it.  Then I called Marian.

Goodbye, Graham,  you lived a good an honorable life.  Rest in peace.

Love, Big Sister Vivian

Bless the day.