and i could not find the will to go. no holiday cheer, no smirks in the corner, watching tipsy boys kiss tipsy girls... i'm lost in my head. i get up, swim through the day as if it were mud. a long walk to the car to deal with alternate side in effect...i sit. i listen to the radio with no heat on getting cold. i people watch, untold stories filing past a stranger sitting in a car waiting for 10am to come.
and the people, they come and go. it's the ever revolving door with new faces turning old. another year come and gone and all i'm left with is "how come?" maybe it's the city dirt that's seeped inside my heart... that bit of everyday uncaring, indifference, and me first...
and you never really know when the floodgates will open..the switch can be hidden in a bittersweet song, in the pretzel man's cart steam swirling, or witnessing the moment a human says goodbye to dying eyes.