franny
bananafish

the more i'm ahead
Wed Dec 01 2004

the more i'm behind.
~~~
a stressful workday so i hit the gym afterwards and pumped some iron and had a 30 min cardio workout on the eliptical trainer. i was so stressed that i was actually contemplating heading to the city to purchase some clove cigarettes...
i opted, instead, to go to the gym and just work it off. i think, as healthful as i try to be, i'm a perfect candidate for a heart attack.

changed into street clothes and walked home. the night was beautiful...it was one of those nightskies where you can see the clouds still slowly moving across. i don't mind the cold. i was proud that i beat the craving for a clove.

then i get home and find stuffed underneath my door an envelope from the landlady. my rent is going up. i will admit that that just tipped the scale for me...i cried like a baby. i'm now regretting going premium for this site. and it sure cured me of making any future purchases of cigarettes. something's gotta give.

i'm currently shopping for another job...at least part-time so that i can continue the driving lessons. i'm deflated and yet still determined. i'm pissed and just pig-headed enough to keep on moving...

i'm hoping the avalanche that Salamander said i'd be riding, doesn't toss me off too soon. work with me here, Mr. Avalanche.
~~~
i need to get to sleep.

goodnight.

2 Comments
  • From:
    Salamander (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Dec 02 2004
    I noticed that Google also had a red ribbon link on their search engine home page today as well. Awareness is slowly being raised.
  • From:
    Sezrah (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Dec 02 2004
    oh my yes, i forgot about it being world aids day. used to know because i was volunteer for that aids group but haven't been one for a couple years now