Salamander
Fire Walking

Squish-o-gram
Sat Sep 28 2002

You just have to think it was a guy who invented the mammogram. No way would a woman ever devise anything quite so diabolical. I'm getting it into my head that what the Female Nation needs to do as a return favor is license the Scrotogram, and then get the AMA to require all guys over a certain age to endure the test every other year.

It was thoughts like this that got me through the indignity.

On the plus side, I got to wear jeans for the first time in nearly a month yesterday. I know the fluid is going to build back up, so I'm enjoying my more nearly humanoid form while I can. I was please that the Socialist noticed before I had to prod him - guess I must look much better than I did. I know I have tons more energy. I also still have insomnia though. I guess a nice paracentesis doesn't cure everything.

It's hard to believe, but I'm close to being finished with all the preliminary tests that I was told I'd have to get before my transplant testing/orientation day downtown. I still have a little over two weeks before that though. If all goes well, my plan is to return to work as soon after that as possible. I'll have to miss one day a month for the belly-puncture routine, but my boss has no problem with that.

To give you a hint exactly how low the highlights of my day have fallen, I stumbled over a low sodium mustard at the store today and nearly broke out in dance and song. I have a receipe for making a low sodium ketchup, but after the mayonnaise fiasco, I think I'll hold off for a bit.

6 Comments
  • From:
    Coolkids (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Sep 28 2002
    Ohhhhhh.... sounds painful. Im hoping before the day comes I need regular checks they invent something than goes zip/zapsh rather that squish
  • From:
    Sezrah (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Sep 28 2002
    ouch, i've heard they're pretty bad
  • From:
    MoonriddenGirl (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Sep 28 2002
    You're convincing me that I'd rather go sugar-free than salt-free. I've spent a good half-hour combing the web trying to find low-sodium mayonnaise to purchase, and I've had no luck. :/

    Tons of low-sodium mayonnaise recipes, however. Looks like you've got plenty of resources if you want to try again. (sigh)
  • From:
    Valyum (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Sep 28 2002
    i'd say that men over the age of 18 need to scrotograms yearly.

    glad you're feeling better!!! the joy of jeans, eh? i'm smiling for yous.
  • From:
    Lightmiracle (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Sep 29 2002
    Yay for fitting into jeans and legal condiments.
    As for the scrotogram--*snart*--but,I think the human gene pool is in enough trouble already.
  • From:
    TraumaMama911 (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Sep 29 2002
    Yippee on wearing jeans again and almost being done with all the testing!
    If guys had to go thru that kind of testing it would never get done!