The topic of today - Regrets...I though I have lots…but when the mind peels off the cover from what he thinks is a regret, and suddenly they are not so…amazingly, I have very little...I think, it is more of a "common" perception that everyone must do something they shouldn't and that everyone done plenty of that...when I'm thinking of what I would truly regret of...many little things I thought would fit into this category have suddenly lost their "regretfulness"...because, you know, when we learn something from doing it wrong way, then, perhaps, we were meant to do it wrong to learn...if you'd take something that happened in your life and trace the consequences of it to the now, you might find that by not doing or by doing it your "wrong" way you actually triggered the events to go the way that eventually get you and the others to a better place then as if could've been… all happens for a reason, they say.
one of my biggest regrets I can never forgive to myself is that I found the real me too late to enjoy being her fully...:-) in simple words...that I spent my best younger years being sure I'm not worthy the life that I've got and trust me, there was nothing much about that life anyway...reached nothing, gained nothing, it was an existence, not living…gray…too much of time being wasted instead of being enjoyed...I used to see myself as the last person in queue for getting what they wish. Mind you, I didn’t hate me. Just didn’t love enough.
Perhaps, because of that regret I now don't give myself a chance to miss a chance when he is within my reach...I have to do more, to be more to compensate for times I was nobody... We are missing so much in life when we sit still...no one gonna serve your dreams to you in bed on a plate with golden border...you have to get up and go for it while you can... They say: we spend first half of life making mistakes to learn from them and the second half – regretting that we haven’t done it differently. I want to spend my second half making even more mistakes, if that is what is needed to feel alive.
On a human side of me: still haven’t tamed my hay fever…all dr’s promises appeared to be empty so far…I still under house/office arrest and have to miss a yearly event I always used to attend: Summer Solstice in Stonehenge. It is tonight and there is no way I could spend all night in the fields with the grasses and still be alive in the morning…’tis a pity, coz I love these wild spiritual nights when you get to touch ancient stones and greet the sun rising to the longest day in a company of samelike crazy crowd…
I found that while I’m not my usual well&healthy me, things stop happening. As if the world around me stopped to take a breath while I’m struggling with mine…nothing to be excited about and nothing to report. Hibernation of the mind while the body exercises healing…
one of my biggest regrets I can never forgive to myself is that I found the real me too late to enjoy being her fully...:-) in simple words...that I spent my best younger years being sure I'm not worthy the life that I've got and trust me, there was nothing much about that life anyway...reached nothing, gained nothing, it was an existence, not living…gray…too much of time being wasted instead of being enjoyed...I used to see myself as the last person in queue for getting what they wish. Mind you, I didn’t hate me. Just didn’t love enough.
Perhaps, because of that regret I now don't give myself a chance to miss a chance when he is within my reach...I have to do more, to be more to compensate for times I was nobody... We are missing so much in life when we sit still...no one gonna serve your dreams to you in bed on a plate with golden border...you have to get up and go for it while you can... They say: we spend first half of life making mistakes to learn from them and the second half – regretting that we haven’t done it differently. I want to spend my second half making even more mistakes, if that is what is needed to feel alive.
On a human side of me: still haven’t tamed my hay fever…all dr’s promises appeared to be empty so far…I still under house/office arrest and have to miss a yearly event I always used to attend: Summer Solstice in Stonehenge. It is tonight and there is no way I could spend all night in the fields with the grasses and still be alive in the morning…’tis a pity, coz I love these wild spiritual nights when you get to touch ancient stones and greet the sun rising to the longest day in a company of samelike crazy crowd…
I found that while I’m not my usual well&healthy me, things stop happening. As if the world around me stopped to take a breath while I’m struggling with mine…nothing to be excited about and nothing to report. Hibernation of the mind while the body exercises healing…