Cruel Kind Friends
Thu Sep 23 2004

What of other ppl’s actions appear the cruelest to you?
When they say mean things to you?
When they do mean things to you?
When they betray your trust in them?
When they deceive you?
When they pretend being one and turn out to be different when you least expected?

For me one of the cruelest – when a close friend push you to fall and keep hitting when you down.

Isn’t friendship plays hard practical jokes on us all the time? Just when you’d think, you safe with your friend, when you believe that you can trust them, that they can help, you lowed your guards, you shared your problems...

Indeed it is those treacherous pushes, that making it so hard to believe in real friendship, real love, real life. Isn't it better to refrain?..

When soul lies down in that grass, the world's fool to talk about. Ideas, language, even the phrase each other doesn't make any sense. [Rumi]

5 Comments
  • From:
    SpaceBetween (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Sep 23 2004
    I agree with you that love is about giving. I guess I was thinking of love in broader terms than just the romantic when I spoke of people who are difficult to love. I find it difficult for example, to love my mother, but I find myself loving her and wanting her in my life despite the fact that she can be quite toxic. I have found that it takes a lot of effort on my part to keep my expectations in check and accept her for who she is, rather than hold her to the standard of what I might want her to be as my mother. So I guess what I'm saying is that I agree with you that love is about giving, but sometimes it's hard to not expect something in return.
  • From:
    Labyrinth (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Sep 23 2004
    For me, it's the betrayal of trust. As I have said, we all keep a mask. In time that one will be revealed as one desires. But the friendship is developed through time by love and trust. We get to share secrets and things we would not choose to reveal to others. I believe once such trust was betrayed it mars and cracks a foundation both of you have built together.

    Orient:)
  • From:
    Bubbles1956 (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Sep 23 2004
    I can't imagine a real friend hurting another like that but sometimes people are misread, or misinterpreted too. I hate to hurt others and I am more easily hurt lately. I hope you don't have that happening to you.
  • From:
    AmenRa (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Sep 23 2004
    Meanness and cruelty are often matters of perspective based on moods. What can be heard in a good mood will differ from what will be heard in a bad one, even if the words are exactly the same.

    Perhaps a reflection on this might help to enlighten the intent. Or to simply ask the friend. What might appear treacherous could actually be something else. The value of the friendship will determine we handle these things.
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Sep 24 2004
    I'm very careful about my friendships for the very reasons you cited. I've been hurt, and I don't want it to happen again. I have lots of acquaintances, people I like, but VERY few friends, and only one or two I trust with my innermost feelings.

    Shalom, dear, you really are a valuable person!