When all is over it is easier to look back and see the lessons learned…why is that experience comes only after we needed it… I don’t want to say I’m over this yet…don’t want to claim the victory over the mourning period…I just don’t want to provoke possible relapse. But if I’d ever to write a divorce survival guide, I would start it with: if you gonna go, go. The worst that you can do is to stay long enough so that when you finally start moving, the other already forgot how to put one foot in front of the other. What is more merciful: to cut it off slowly and gently for what seems an eternity or make it a fast and effective kill…it certainly hurts more when it’s fast, but it will heal quicker too. I thought the worst was over and I’m on my way when last Monday I’ve returned from work to find him packing…I don’t want to talk about this anymore. I had whole week to hammer that nail into my forehead and hang a sign on it: it’s over. And so it is. Time to take a deep breath... I’m a bit surprised how now it feels almost like a relief despite of the fact that the ending is not the happy one…But then again – I’m not a fairy tale princess either to expect one…I’m back to reading poetry and to me this is a good sign…hmmm…does this make any sense? Probably not…but then again – who said – it should?
am was. by e. e. cummings
am was. are leaves few this. is these a or
scratchily over which of earth dragged once
-ful leaf. & were who skies clutch an of poor
how colding hereless. air theres what immense
live without every dancing. singless on-
ly a child's eyes float silently down
more than two those that and that noing our
gone snow gone
yours mine
. We're
alive and shall be:cities may overflow(am
was)assassinating whole grassblades,five
ideas can swallow a man;three words im
-prison a woman for all her now:but we've
such freedom such intense digestion so
much greenness only dying makes us grow