I went back in time to my early entries. I found that bringing some of them back to life could be an interesting exercise. Even myself I don’t remember what made me write one or the other journal entry, but reading them now feels like talking to the Stranger. I sure did changed…
I wrote this 2 years ago:
What does it means: "to be in peace within yourself"? Does it signify that moment, when you stop searching? I mean - stop looking for something more exciting then your own life? Or - perhaps - when you are satisfied with yourself so completely, that don't need to make further effort to strive to perfection? When one knows that "enough is enough"? I am surely not perfect and by all means want to be more of that Perfect Individual. But does it mean that I am not ever able to achieve illusive "peace of mind"? I think - it's unfair that those who are in constant search, will never get relaxed, but those who in their negligence declare themselves to be on the Top already, can have most wanted relief without making an effort…
Times gone since. And I’ve changed, of course…I can even open a debate with myself…Me versus Me...what do I think about peace of mind now is different from what I thought back then. Peace of mind is not when you satisfied with yourself. It is when you satisfied with what you’ve created around you. A Bubble of Comfort...
A smile could be faked; communication – could be forced; appreciation could be –to gain advantage; invitation – just a gesture of good will; honesty – well, you can’t check it all; tricks and masks – common communication methods; secrets – same old question of trust. There is only comfort left, which you can’t fake for yourself. You either feel comfort or - you don’t. This is almost the only feeling, that can’t be artificial - it’s pretty much of an “intuitive”...
I wrote this 2 years ago:
What does it means: "to be in peace within yourself"? Does it signify that moment, when you stop searching? I mean - stop looking for something more exciting then your own life? Or - perhaps - when you are satisfied with yourself so completely, that don't need to make further effort to strive to perfection? When one knows that "enough is enough"? I am surely not perfect and by all means want to be more of that Perfect Individual. But does it mean that I am not ever able to achieve illusive "peace of mind"? I think - it's unfair that those who are in constant search, will never get relaxed, but those who in their negligence declare themselves to be on the Top already, can have most wanted relief without making an effort…
Times gone since. And I’ve changed, of course…I can even open a debate with myself…Me versus Me...what do I think about peace of mind now is different from what I thought back then. Peace of mind is not when you satisfied with yourself. It is when you satisfied with what you’ve created around you. A Bubble of Comfort...
A smile could be faked; communication – could be forced; appreciation could be –to gain advantage; invitation – just a gesture of good will; honesty – well, you can’t check it all; tricks and masks – common communication methods; secrets – same old question of trust. There is only comfort left, which you can’t fake for yourself. You either feel comfort or - you don’t. This is almost the only feeling, that can’t be artificial - it’s pretty much of an “intuitive”...