Oh my goodness gracious, I am still trying to sort out my emotions from yesterday because I did NOT have the time to do it all by the time I finally rested and slept through the night without any dreams to remember and getting up at 5 AM to begin my Sunday. Deb got here at 7:30 AM, made me my breakfast and plan to come back by 3:30 PM to get me supper. Before she left for the morning and early afternoon before 3:30 PM, she made sure I had snacks and my lunch nearby for me until she came back to get supper made for me. I eat three meals a day and have snacks and water by me when I am not out and about shopping or going to the movies on my non-dialysis days that are now Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, and Saturday afternoon after 4 pm, and Sundays and Mondays. I have two weekends again since I moved from one dialysis center to another — much better one I am going to now. When I had my meltdown Tuesday night, it was one fight that I had failed to stop before Mr. Monkey unfortunately got his damn banana stash from me, I had learned what a friend did to another friend’s boyfriend had set off my emotions to be dealt with. My emotions I was dealing with was sadness, anger, frustration, and happy. I had some difficulty with what my friend told me about another friend we both share and had to deal with a lot in the past before deciding to walk away from this friendship and just be civil and kind. Now, with what I had heard 

yesterday morning, I have heard the worst about a friend I cared deeply about enough to help her, now, but yet … here I go …

With it only after 9 pm on a Sunday night, I am getting to the emotions I dealt with, and I had told Jackie what was told to me because I was so disgusted with it. I was angry and seething about it. So, sorting out my anger, sadness, happiness, and wondering and getting them in the right place is NOT an easy task and there was no way I am giving Mr. Monkey his stash of bananas to eat today or the weekend! So, here I am, sorting out my emotions in the best way I know how now before going to sleep tonight. I have a counseling appointment tomorrow at 2 PM and Deb will not be here until 9 AM, so I can sleep in if my body needs to rest. More to come …