Our first Snow of the season had happened today. The temperature we had the past few days have proven to be the reason why snow flurries came from the big grey sky of this fall/winter season of the year. The weather forecast even said snow this week, and the forecaster was correct in calling it out. I like it when the weather people do speak the truth. Today is the second winter season I have had adopted a sister kitty for Magic kitty cat. Millie has been in her new home for eleven months now, and she has come a long way from her skittish kitten days to her first birthday in July of 2024. She loves Deb and allows me to pet her now. Magic’ turned 4 in May. I love my babies. My babies watched the snow attack the windows in the bedroom and living room and bedroom and enjoying their fun moments. Good cats.
For Thursday’s day, I stayed home with my cats. All I did today was watch Dateline 24/7, Murder, She Wrote, a documentary about Charles Manson. What an interesting gentleman who was one sick man who was a mass murderer with his so-called women followers. I remember who he had murdered because I have seen more than one documentary on tv. Anyway, Deb was here and got me out of bed to change my underwear and get my pajamas back on, and back in bed to continue watching tv. Jackie got here by 9:50 am and stayed until 2 pm to go get stuff done at home and to come a couple of times up to 8 pm. She ran some errands for my neighbor friends and had an issue with logging in and out of the app we use clock in and out each day. The app and internet are horrible here because Garden Court needs to allow Spectrum Internet access to upgrading their service in the building. Some apartments cannot have the internet because of the building being older. We also have terrible management issues here, too. This place has turned into a slum apartment complex because management does not seem to care and thru are not following HUD rules themselves. This Thursday was a ‘I don’t care day.’ I ate breakfast and lunch in bed and was allowed to have a fudge sickle and a minion popsicle when Jackie dropped by two different times after 2 pm. Her helping my neighbor friends may he good, but sometimes I wish she would not help my neighbors when she is getting paid by my program IRIS. I do not like it when already I think something is not right about how she gets paid and when. Something is fishy about the system. It is complicated and the system is not designed right. The government seems to have more control of the lives of those who are disabled and handicapped. It seems scary at times. Something is not right with how Jackie and Deb get paid. We have had two companies helping in 2023 because Deb was having treatment for six to seven months at the Mercy Cancer Center and she could not work or be around other people for a while. We caught a company being fraudulent and they got caught out by Jackie and my IRIS consultant Julie and were dismissed. Now, my Thursday afternoon and evening is going to become Friday before we know it. I had no plans today, but because of next week being Thanksgiving Day and weekend, I have dialysis on Sunday and Tuesday, and my weekend will be Wednesday and Thursday, and have dialysis again on Friday, and my Saturday and Sunday until Christmas and New Year’s. I am not looking forward to going to dialysis on different days during the holidays.
Mom’s gifts to Jackie are consolation rises because she did not call on Sunday according to Jackie’s feelings. I am not sure why my mom sent me to T-shirts with cats on them. We did not talk on Sunday. Jackie thinks that mom . Sometimes I do not know my mom or care to any longer. I have, since my parents being here for our Thanksgiving Day dinner that was planned last week, I have realized something about my broken family and found some peace. With mom not calling on Sunday and her excuse seemed lame and stupid—rainy weather and she was too tired to call, I need not to text her ‘can we talk now’ is not necessary anymore. I will be stopping that. When I saw she had not called by 6 pm, I was too tired 🥱 to say anything to her. After texting her on Wednesday about her not calling me on Sunday and her response was it was rainy and she was so tired, I told Jackie that excuse upset me. She understood and could see that the unforeseen circumstances of getting on the machine five minutes after my original time of 11:45 am had sent me into my quiet place of watching tv, hardly saying anything to anyone in the climiv. Coming to the realization that, even though I do not feel comfortable with my dad and stepmom Sandy by myself and I have this love/hate relationship with my parents and Jackie, my dad will always be there for me in a pinch when my mom will not. When my mom does not execute wise words onto me, I know where I have learned to be selfish and self-centered sometimes. I learned it from my mom. Well, things are going to change. That is why I had gotten so easily discouraged and offended the week before when Kayla, Marie’s sister, pissed me off. I never got an apology and if she has an attitude like she did again, I am done with her for good like Janessa O and all her lies. Janessa’s latest does not make me happy for me to trust her anymore. I do not trust her anymore, period! Kayla has done enough to want nothing to do with her. I have not said anything to her except an occasional hello because she happened to be in my presence with Marie and Jackie were with me. We just got back from the movies. We saw Red One —my first Christmas movie of the year. Because Hallmark and Lifetime, and a couple of other tv channels show Christmas movies and shows all year round has spoiled my want to watch Christmas movie on any channel or app, I will watch an occasional Christmas movie or show during the holidays today.
I continue to go blah, blah, blah because I am so emotional at times. I get it. I am having more emotional issues right now because my holidays are not what they used to be so long ago. I come from a broken family I guess. There is a lot of mental illness issues in my family that are not all. addressed.