I am making this journal public because I have a family I have loved and hated though the years because of the feeling of an outsider lookingin a family with my eyes. I feel uncomfortable being with my parents alone because of the negative remarks I end up hearing from their mouths. I have endured a lot from my parents that any child has to deal with. I have cherished family togetherness for years up until recently. The elements of weather and illness have delayed my seeing my parents for a holiday meal. Now my dad was in the hospital to have a procedure done to check for blockages of the heart and nothing showed such blockages with the end result...whew! Yet, how I found out was unexpected from my SIL a family member we have issues with at times. She is not our favorite person these days!