Comments
Fri Jul 23 2004

I had to chuckle when I saw this comment was left by Unauthenticated. I'm not sure why someone would want to be unidentified with this comment, but who knows how a persons mind works?

Unauthenticated comments:
I appreciate everyone’s thought good and bad as well. Why would your children be reading their mothers private thoughts? What is really yours, and yours alone--if not this. It's important for everyone to have their own personal space, and I don’t' think I'd think it was appropriate for children to be reading their mothers journal--do you let them listen to all of your adult conversations as well?

Now, if my journaling were the type in which I gave uncensored details of my sex life, then no, I wouldn't let my children read it. However, my diary is something I hope to use as a historical chronicle to look back on, as well as for my family and friends to use in order to keep up with what is going on. I don’t put anything in my diary that I am ashamed of, or that my children shouldn’t read. While my 10 year old isn’t interested in reading it, #1 & #2 get a hoot from several entries, and do read it on occasion.

Anything I put in here regarding my relationship with any of my children is something I have spoken with them about prior to my entries. They know I use this to vent frustrations as well as to express other aspects of myself. I have encouraged them to open up diaries themselves, and I know some people who read my diary on a regular basis have visited at least the diary of #1, I don’t think #2’s has surfaced yet with anyone outside of the family.

As far as letting the boys listen to my adult conversations, yes and no. While Hubby and I don’t include the kids in our pillow talk (although we do torment them by verbalizing our love and kissing in front of them, which produces a loud YUCK! from #3) we do include them in other conversation. Besides doing the sex, drug, smoking, alcohol and stranger talks and role playing games with them, we discuss anything they ask about. Religion, politics, school, philosophy, money, art, science, you name it and we have discussed it with the kids. While I want my kids to be kids and enjoy their childhood while it lasts, I don’t think they should be sheltered. They know the why’s behind the rules we set, and like most kids they don’t always agree with them, but they know them. When Hubby and I argue about something, we do take ourselves away from the kids to do it. That being said, we do let them hear us come to agreements when they know there is a difference of opinion between us.

As far as what is really mine, and mine alone, cyberspace is the last place I put those thoughts. Yes this diary is for me, but it is for me to share. The parts of myself I don’t want to share with the world are kept elsewhere. Some of those come out eventually here in the diary when I’m willing to face them, but others will remain elsewhere forever. The parts of myself I need to keep for only me are not things I would put into an online diary.

My diary, with the exception of only one entry that I can think of off the top of my head, is primarily PG-13. It is out there for the world to see, and I don’t really care who sees it. Admittedly I use a great deal of artistic liberties with many of the incidents I put in here. In the future I don’t want to look back on grim aspects of my life, I want to look back and laugh at myself, and the scenarios I went through. If someone does not like what I write, or if they disagree with what they perceive I am saying, there is a nifty little X up in the right hand corner they are welcome to use.

Do the kids know that I am occasionally frustrated and angry about things that happen with them? Yes. But they also know that I love them unconditionally. Have I ever verbally threatened to duct tape the kids? Yes, but they know it is an empty threat, and that I only say that when I’m to the point when I need to point out the ridiculousness of the situation. On the other hand, when I threaten to take their Game-Boy away if their behavior doesn’t shape up, they know that I’m serious.

Like my bro, I am prone to wild exaggerations of situations I experience. While I’m not the storyteller Albert Finney/Ewan McGregor was in Big Fish, I have been known to embellish from time to time. As far as my diary goes, anyone is welcome to read it, but remember to keep your tongue in cheek as needed.

17 Comments
  • From:
    Everlong (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    Sorry to butt in but I'd like to say that you shouldn't mind that kind of comments, this is YOUR journal and it happens to be pretty decent, so why not let the children read it? :-) And if people like to make such judgements, why don't they reveal their DD id? That really enervates me. Keep up the good journalism!

    Jo
  • From:
    Salamander (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    Perhaps your mysterious commentator was hoping you'd start including some of the juicier adult aspects of your life, thereby requiring all entrants to present their credit card and visit you in the "adult" sector of DD.

  • From:
    ImNotLisa (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    Acutally, I like even better now that I know the kids read your diary. Because you write primarily of love for them, and they can see that. I think it's a wonderful thing for all of you!
  • From:
    Supertrooper (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    people can be so mean mouthed ..you put them right back in their place tho ..wtg ! I read no1's diary and left him a comment ..bless him ! Havent stumbled across no3's yet ..I will look out for it .
    You are a good mom , wife and friend .
    How IS Franisbueno doing since the wedding ? How fun that she came over . Wish I could meet up with my DD buddies in real life too .
    I dont comment here often ..but am here reading and enjoying daily .
    Hugs from Canada hun .
    Linda
    xxxxxx
  • From:
    Enchantedbutterfly (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    3 cheers to Allimom! Well said!

  • From:
    InStitches (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    Nicely stated and besides, each of us makes our own rules for how we want to use our diaries. Its your diary and they are your kids. You get to make the rules for both. Personally, I think you are doing a grand job of it. :)
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    Unauthenticated entries should be deleted. If a writer is not willing to be identified then his/her opinions aren't worth the time it takes to write them. Or read them.

    Anonymous callers, unauthenticated writers are cowards. Identify yourself, and let the chips fall where they may.

    When I suggested a straitjacket, you knew who was making the suggestion!

    Shalom
  • From:
    Becoming (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    My daughter reads sometimes. If I don't want to share with her, then the entry goes friends only.

    I love the blue!

    My comments are boring and inane (actually, don't know what that means . . . *smile*) but I leave 'em anyway and I love to get 'em.

    Have a great day!

    ~Anne
  • From:
    MagicWhiskey (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    I don't get why they'd make it unautheticated. As far as comments go it's a very mild one.
  • From:
    Enchantedbutterfly (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri Jul 23 2004
    The best mother is a cunning mother...LOL

    I bet if they had realized the alterior motive, they would have been less enthusiastic! LOL

    Butterfly
  • From:
    Ichandra (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Jul 24 2004
    hey what fun to let the kids read the journal it is good therapy isnt it for them to laugh at the discipline excellent idea because people usually grow up feeling so guilty about the way they behaved and treated their parents and your kids can look back and say hey i couldnt have been that bad mom was laughin
    hee hee im feeling so mischeivous today it is 100f it is too hot for me i am used to predominantly the tundra kind of weather
    anyway i just wanted to say if the kids areso focused on the diary and alot of it is about them then if they dont like a comment then wouldnt they have a right to ask to have it deleted
    hee hee there is an idea
    ofcourse theyprobably dont care one way or another they are too busy swimming etc but it would be interesting to hear what they would have to say let us know if you do ask
    im just blogging on the weekend i wouldnt want to missthis if there are any publications on this please let me know the date of the entry in my journal
    have a beautiful week my friend
  • From:
    Nettie (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Jul 24 2004
    I think it's awesome that your kids know about and read your diary sometimes. What an awesome thing for them to have to read back on years from now. I hope I can do the same for my kids (when I have 'em!). Ooooo... say hi to Fran for me!! I miss her entries!
  • From:
    Labyrinth (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Jul 24 2004
    And you write so neat and funny, allimom, that even a situation like that ghost-possessed washer of yours sounds too funny. :)))

    Orient:)
  • From:
    ImNotLisa (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Jul 24 2004
    Hugs to Alli~ :o)
  • From:
    Ichandra (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Jul 24 2004
    it could be that this comment is unauthenticated because it is an outside user who really wasnt familiar with what goes on in the diary and was too quick to draw a conclusion
    i think most people are not out to insult you they may say something that makes you feel uncomfortable and then you have to decide what is the priority freedom of speech or comfort zone i have seen a lot of blood sweat and tears over this freedom of speech thing and i guess everyone has to decide what will be their top priority
    mine is why allow people to show disrespect for you and make you feel uncomfortable when all you have to do is click the mouse
    in my opinion and i will be glad to share it thanks for the opportunity this is always one of my favourite topics
    in my opinion respect for the person comes when you dont ban them you give them another chance it is like saying i know you are not a bad person and you didnt stop to think that this would offend me so bye bye comment but you are welcome back
    for a few months i was commenting in a journal that had a strong emphasis on photography i used to enjoy going into this journal it is now discontinued anyway i used to enjoy adding the word to these wonderful images
    one time i said something that offended the diarist she deleted
    i went back and said im sorry if offended i didnt mean to and she swore she did not delete but i know she did and im glad she did what i said was offensive to the mood of her journal
    she emphasized to me that she looked forward to my comments the most and ibelieve this because i did put a lot of effort into the writing and it was very rewarding
    anyway in my opinion giving the other person a second chance is the most respectful thing you can do and still maintain your own dignity
    i like your comment alli if people dont like what i do there is that little box with an x in it in the corner that they can click that was cute it is so true and that is the absolute bottom line
  • From:
    Ichandra (Legacy)
    On:
    Sat Jul 24 2004
    ps hee hee a good topic also i would like to add that most of the time people would not even be aware that you have deleted their comment well if you deleted in the spirit to get even then you wouldnt want that but if you didnt want to advertise it they probably wouldnt be aware of it or at least be wondering
    i discovered that if someone posts a comment when you are logged in then the comment will not show up to the public
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun Jul 25 2004
    You are the sneaky Mom, aren't you. Heh=heh, it really worked.

    How's the mood now. Did you talk to Hubby about your strange vibes? Talking never hurts, y'know, as long as it's not accusatory. Maybe he's worried about something and needs to be encouraged to share.

    Oh, it's none of my business, but I feel like giving advice, anyway.

    Shalom