DearDiary Logo
Public DiariesHomeLogin

The Ransom of Red Chief
Tue Jan 15 2002

Now here was a boy who was clearly ADHD. I believe my #1 son is the modern Red Chief.

I believe, that should my #1 son be kidnapped, like Red Chief, the kidnappers would have to pay me to take him back. Particularly if he were kidnapped after an attitude day like today.

Intellectually I know he is not really at fault. Being 11 and trying to cope with the onset of puberty is enough for any boy. Throw in ADHD, ODD, Bi-Polar and depression and you never have a dull moment! I am at the point now where I just want to be able to keep him out of jail and the hospital until he is 18. After then maybe, just maybe I will be able to breath easier. As a parent, my heart keeps reminding me that this won't be the case, but I have decided to play the part of Cleopatra today and not listen to that little voice. If necessary I will beat it into submission with Ice Cream and Cookies.

My #1 son however has learned to manipulate us using his problems. If he doesn't want to do something, he will start a tantrum. Unfortunately I never know when one of these tantrums will result in him being physically abusive. He is almost always verbally abusive, and in several of the tantrums it is not uncommon for him to come after me, or one of his siblings. My son is the reason you will not find anything sharper than a butter knife in my home. If you need scissors, you are out of luck. Cutting up meat? Forget it, meat is now finger food. I wish it were otherwise, but after his suicide attempts and trying to gut me and his brother with one of my kitchen knives, I just can't trust him enough to keep them in the house.

I think the most frustrating part is that he does not pull this with his father. When Hubby is home on the weekends, #1 Son seldom has any problems, and if he does they never escalate to the point they do when it is just me.

And Hubby can't figure out why I want to send #1 to Military School....




Dude, might want to switch to Decaf...

Commercial on TV reminded me of a customer I had today who was completely flipping out because of something extremely minor her 'puter was doing. I thought she was going to have a stroke on the phone she just kept going on and on getting angrier and more agitated the more she spoke.
Come on people, lighten up a bit!




Note to self

Never point and laugh at someone caught picking their nose while driving a pickup in traffic, if they have a gun rack in their rear window.
Not a good idea.
9 Comments
  • From:
    Paulette (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jan 15 2002
    My heart goes out to you. Except for the physical abuse you speak of, you could have been talking about my son near that age.

    I just want to tell you that we lived through it and now he is (finally!) a responsible adult. It seems like all he needed to do was grow up and he was a late bloomer but he did and I'm so very thankful. I will pray for you and him.

    Love,
    paul

  • From:
    Inmyhead63 (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jan 15 2002
    wow alli...you've got your work cut out for you with "RED CHIEF". I guess your lesson this life is PATIENCE and tons of it huh?
    Your boys are so blessed to have a mom like you with a great sense of humour. I spose you tell yourself "its better to laugh than cry" and you would be so right. I envy that humour of yours.
    I am good at pity partys and my kids are sure sick of that.
    well..hang in there. Your son may have some special gifts that may come from all this..once you get that one figured out he'll maybe be able to calm himself down some. I know I have read that they do grow out of it.
    my sister has an adhd 10 yr old and spending time with him is liking living thru a whirlwind so i do have an idea what you mean.
    diana
  • From:
    Fyyre (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jan 15 2002
    Hi, nopee thats not an mp3. It's actually a midi file. I did some html codes and put in my entry head, entry footer and enntry index or something. Its too long and complicated a process to explain. Let me know if you need more help. Ill be glad to.
  • From:
    Shay4l (Legacy)
    On:
    Tue Jan 15 2002
    I wonder if you could secretly videotape a tantrum and play it for hubby. Or even easier just an audio tape.
  • From:
    Nataku (Legacy)
    On:
    Wed Jan 16 2002
    Hmmm, your son sounds a little like me when I was little. Don't worry, he's turn from a little tantrum into a big problem, hehe. The best thing you can do is learn to say no, I wish my mom did...

    Nataku
  • From:
    Melange (Legacy)
    On:
    Wed Jan 16 2002
    A most interesting read and now I am wondering if your Son is Bipolar, is he taking meds? Child therapy too is also a great benefit for those who suffer this illness. Therapy for all Bipolars, whether they are Bipolar1 or Bipolar2 would always be my recommendation. Bipolar (Manic Depressive Disorder) is an illness that I am sure you must know, has no cure - only stabilization. I could converse with you at great length on this subject. I am very happy that he has a wonderful Mom like you to help and support him.
  • From:
    Allimom (Legacy)
    On:
    Wed Jan 16 2002
    #1 is on meds, a mood stabilizer for the Bi-Polar, an anti-depressant and then there is the ADHD med. I think he is extremely frustrated that he has to take so many pills every day, he really HATES it.
    He was seeing a Child Psychiatrist for more than a year, but did not do well with her as he tends to respond negatively to trying to talk things out. We are not sure where to go from here.
    Alli
  • From:
    Annette (Legacy)
    On:
    Wed Jan 16 2002
    oh alli... your dayz must be exhausting...

    i can't even begin to imagine.

    @
  • From:
    Melange (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu Jan 17 2002
    Ali - Please try another therapist as there is hope. Meds can dissilusion adults so I can imagine how a child must feel.