Has anyone ever been to a graduation before? They take place in a very large, closed, crowded room.
I fought down the instinct to run screaming and flailing until it was like bile in the back of my throat; there, but not out in the open. I tend to bounce my leg all the time, and Saturday both legs were bouncing like kids on a trampoline. The kid to my left asked if I was OK, I let him know I was claustrophobic and his response was to ask that I let him know if I was going to hurl so he could get out of the way. The girl to my right was oblivious of everything, too busy screaming and waving to people up in the seats and other graduates in front of, to the side and behind us. Based on her excessively chipper behavior, I can only deduce that she was a cheerleader. I mentally dubbed her "Coed Barbie", and the kid to my left "Spicoli".
I was preoccupied with keeping my sanity, so I couldn’t tell you what anyone said in any of the speeches. We finally lined up to get our degrees (the people in front and back of me had to nudge me to stand up then move along with the line), and I know people were saying things as I could see their lips moving behind the microphone, but I didn’t hear anything but an ocean-like roar in my ears. I was only aware of the people crowding behind me and pushing me forward into the people in front of me.
I finally got up to the stage, and when nobody was in front of me saw the lips moving behind the microphone and several expectant looking faces staring at me. It must be my turn. I walked forward and then stumbled. Handing out diplomas was Edward J. Olmos. I did a double take, he was too short and stocky for Edward J. Olmos, but it could have been his twin. I reached for my diploma and to shake his hand, staring dumbfounded at the Olmos doppelganger, then continued on across the stage staring behind me and almost walking into an octogenarian who glared at me in what I was sure was her most dirty of looks, then shook myself out of the stupor and continued back to my seat.
More people seemed to say things as they came and went to the microphone on the stage, but the dull roar in my ears continued to be all I heard. Things were a blur through the turning of our tassels, and finally we were excused. I sprinted out of the building shoving the rest of the students in front of me into a shuffling run in my desperate attempt to escape the claustrophobic atmosphere. I am proud to say that I don’t think I screamed once. If I did, nobody in my family has confirmed it. They won't look me in the eyes when I ask though, but I'm not going to push the subject.
Once outside I could breathe again, and I suddenly became aware of people talking.
This experience was one that was worth going through, but I need to remember for when my kids graduate, to get a seat near the door! Maybe if I'm lucky the weather will be nice and their graduation will be held outdoors.