We had a family dinner tonight. One of my other Poor cousins (OK, not impoverished, that is just our family name!) is up here visiting from Georgia. It was rather a good evening, my Grandma, my folks, one uncle and aunt, three cousins and the spouses and children that go along with them. While it made for a full house, more so it made for an enjoyable evening.
I'm not often in contact with my cousins on my Dad's side of the family. I would like to be closer to them and hopefully as an adult I can find a way to strengthen the familial bonds there.
When our family married into Dad's family, all of my cousins were quite young, some not even born yet. I was about halfway between the age of my cousins and one of my uncles. The uncle to whom I was closest in age to lived with my family for a while after he graduated from college. I feel closest to him of all my uncles.
I adore my adopted family, but have always had a very difficult time relating to my cousins. For so long they were so much younger than I. Now as adults I finally have some common ground with them. They are beautiful and interesting people, and I would really like to have closer bonds with them.
All of the cousins are spread from Alaska to Georgia, which also makes it difficult connecting to them. As I am slowly collecting their e-mail addresses it will hopefully be even more easier to get to know them better and be closer to them at least virtually.
It also helps to create common bonds that they are all starting families. Having children almost automatically gives us something in common. There is something about parenthood that brings me closer to other parents. Be it an empathy or just knowing that I am on a common ground with that person helps to break the ice.
I grew up with such strong family ties with my Mom's side of the family, it has taught me that family is so important for everyone. I want my children to have good relationships with all of their family, and be able to see them and get to know them. My children are now in the position I was when I entered my family. My boys are 12 and 8, and several cousins are either pregnant now or trying to start a family. They do have three cousins which range between 4 and 9, so they will at least have a bridge that I never had. It will be helpful that they see their cousins every summer when they come up to Alaska, so the relationship between those 6 cousins has a good foundation.