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Recommendations on How To Get Out of Jury Duty
Wed May 09 2007

I jokingly told the folks at work that I was thinking of having a t-shirt made stating I Blog EVERYTHING (thanks to Yetzirah for that idea), and since then everyone has been coming up to me with suggestions on what to do to get myself dismissed.

The following is a list of the more ... amusing ... suggestions. It is not all-inclusive of the suggestions, but these I felt should be shared.

1. Arrive drunk
2. Find the door the defendants use, and talk with everyone who comes through it.
3. Continually ask if you can give the death sentence for the case.
4. Pretend to have narcolepsy.
5. Ask (loudly) where Judge Judy is. Repeatedly.
6. Ask if jurors can call a friend or use a lifeline if they are confused about the case.
7. Continually ask everyone to repeat what they've said, and ask them to define any words with more than 2 syllables.
8. Ask if they give bathroom breaks at least once an hour. Behave very concerned if they don't.
9. Twitch. Lots.
10. Tell them you don't make any decisions about anything without calling your Mom for advise.
11. Ask if your imaginary friend can have a seat next to you.

5 Comments
  • From:
    PixieKitten (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 10 2007
    I have twice been stood down from Jury Duty just because I was pregnant. I was informed very matter of factly that pregnant women were too emotional to be able to make logical deductions! HMMMPFT!

    Of course another good suggestion would be for you purse to 'accidently' spill open and reveal the collection of duct tape, sharp implements, pill containers etc. Im sure that would raise a few eyebrows!

    -pk-
  • From:
    Yetzirah (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 10 2007
    Only thing is when you get in front of the judge, all your bravado and goofiness goes right out and your knees turn to jelly.

    You end up saying 'Yes your honor and no your honor' before you can say Jack Robinson.

    It's totally weird.

    Curious to see how it goes for you.

  • From:
    JustPeachy (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 10 2007
    Oh but those are funny! LOL!!
  • From:
    Welshamethyst (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 10 2007
    I'll keep that in mind for the next time I get called, which, by my calculations, will be some time next week *sigh*
  • From:
    Pragmatist (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 10 2007
    Hey! I got it made. I twitch. Really. That's why I take carbidopa/levodopa and neurontin. I couldn't possibly sit thru a trial, and the meds I take would make me too sleepy to pay attention.

    It's not that I don't want to do my civic duty. I do. Really. But not on jury duty. Tried it once, didn't like it.

    Shalom