An Alphabet For Mom....
Thu May 05 2005

A is for ADULT: A person who had stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

B is for BATHROOM: A room used by the entire family, believed by all except mom to be self cleaning.

C is for COMMITTEE: As in decision by committee, which will be decided when she has already decided how things are going to be.

D is for DATE: Infrequent outings with dad where mom can enjoy worrying about the kids in a different setting.

E is for EMPTY NEST: See WISHFUL THINKING.

F is for FABLE: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

G is for GUM: Adhesive for hair.

H is for HINDSIGHT: What mom experiences from changing too many diapers.

I is for INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

J is for JUNK: Dad's stuff.

K is for KISS: Mom's medicine

L is for LEMONADE STAND: Complicated business venture where mom buys powered mix, sugar, lemons, and paper cups, and sets up a table, chairs pitchers and ice for kids who sit there for three to six minutes and net a profit of 15 cents.

M is for MAYBE: No

N is for NONSENSE: What mom says your friends are full of.

O is for OVERSTUFFED RECLINER: Mom's nickname for dad.

P is for PANIC: What a mother goes through when the darn windup swing stops.

Q is for QUIET: A state of household serenity, which occurs before the birth of the first child and occurs again after the last child has left for college.

R is for REFRIGERATOR: Combination art gallery and air-conditioner for the kitchen.

S is for SPOILED ROTTEN: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with grandma and/or grand dad.

T is for TOWELS: See "FLOOR COVERING".

U is for UNDERWEAR: An article of clothing, the cleanliness of which ensures the wearer will never have an accident.

V is for VACATION: Where you take the family to get away from it all, only to find it there, too.

W is for WALLS: Complete set of drawing paper for kids that comes with every room.

X is for XOXOXOXOXO: Mom salutation guaranteed to make the already embarrassing note in a kid's lunchbox even more mortifying

Y is for "YIPPEE!": What mother shout the first day of school.

Z is for ZUCCHINI: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it
5 Comments
  • From:
    Jamisinc (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 05 2005
    Thank you so much for the rose advice. Tips like that are exactly what I need to know,,,I am a total novice.
  • From:
    Waterspriteflying (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 05 2005
    *giggle!*

    Thanks for the lift!

    Hugs,
    Ani
  • From:
    Yetzirah (Legacy)
    On:
    Thu May 05 2005
    I like the last one best! hee hee
  • From:
    Pinkspiritlady (Legacy)
    On:
    Fri May 06 2005
    My Clemetis is filling in along my little picket fence in the back yard. I don't really have a spot for it to actually climb. I wanted it to climb the little arbor I made from melissas old bed canopy but it dose not seem to like that.
  • From:
    TraumaMama (Legacy)
    On:
    Sun May 08 2005
    LOL Alli, did you see the surprised look on his face? And the girlfriend, she was not a happy camper. I watched him the next day on the CBS morning show and damn, he cleaned up nice. *EVIL GRIN*