Dec 092020
 

Hello and welcome to another entry. I have a lot of thought that needs to be written out. I know I have not been here for a couple of days, but I have been busy, and tired. What is on my mind right now is about living here at the Burbank Plaza apartment complex, the coronavirus, friendship, dialysis, and life in general.  So here it goes.

Dialysis

As far as dialysis is going it is going very well.  As of yesterday December 8, 2020, I have had the catheter removed after a year and a half. I will be taking my first shower in a long time tomorrow. I am looking forward to it. I have a graft in my left arm that has been working since October 6, 2020. I take 325 mg of aspirin a day.  Don’t worry the aspirin was prescribed by Dr. A.

Dialysis has been going smoothly. The catheter quit working a couple of weeks ago when we found out we could not flush it.   It is time for it to be removed and yesterday was one of those wonderful days where I could say goodbye to the catheter. I had this one catheter for a year and a half – – since August 28, 2019. I am glad it is gone. Dr. A said that dialysis is going well as far as my numbers are concerned and the machine cleaning my blood.  When I chose to have hemodialysis as a means to survive, I had my reasons to have treatment cleaning the blood instead of peritoneal dialysis.  I remember how PD affected my body and mind.  Getting peritonitis twice and cellulitis once in the right leg is a bad memory on the back of my mind these days — 33 years ago this year.

Getting the catheter out is a blessing in disguise. Yes, I still have to do dialysis three times a week sitting in an uncomfortable chair for three hours and fifteen minutes of my day, but now I have a working graft in my left arm. I am blessed. I am loved. I am someone’s miracle. The chance of getting an infection now is nil as having a catheter can make the chances do infection greater, and not getting an infection in the last year and a half has been prayed for.  The techs and nurses at the dialysis center kept my catheter site clean and the catheter in working order. Tomorrow is Thursday and I have treatment.

Burbank Plaza Woes Continue

Life at Burbank Plaza continues.  As I stay in my apartment because of the COVID-19 pandemic in the United States and other countries, I am doing everything I can to not get sick.  I leave and come home to a growing kitty and continue my life.  I say hello to other tenants and neighbors as I come and go, but I don’t get into a conversation with them often.  We can not use the community room right now because the virus is on the rise in Rock County — Janesville, Wisconsin.  As I leave and come back, I have to wear a mask.  As an observer and a person with feelings, I see other tenants and neighbors NOT wearing their masks in the hallway and common areas of/inside the building.  Why can’t tenants take the time to follow the rules and regulations?  Ugg!!  I am not a rule-breaker nor do I like bending the rules for anyone.

Ants

My apartment has little ants right now.  Management is going to look into someone coming into my apartment to get rid of the ants.  These ants are very small and fast. They bite, too! I wonder why I have them now, too.

Other Tenants

I still do not communicate with other tenants to this day.  Yes, I will say hello in passing, but otherwise, I keep to myself.  I do my best at not being rude, but certain tenants do not abide by the rules of living here.  I do not like the attitude of some of the tenants here, and my association with others in the building is limited.  With the coronavirus out there, going to another apartment is not happening right now.  I do my best not to be rude.

 The Coronavirus

I do have to admit that I am a little bit restless because I can’t do much right now because of the spreading of the virus out there.  DKF does her best to get me out and about safely every Tuesday.  We go to the laundromat together before my treatment, but this week my laundry will not be done until Saturday while at dialysis because DKF had to go to Fort McCoy with her husband Monday, and Tuesday, I didn’t see her until 2 PM or shortly after.  Wearing a mask as I leave and come back home from an outing or dialysis has become a new norm for me.  I have walked out of my apartment on numerous accounts without my mask that was embarrassing.  Do I need to say more?  I’ve always wondered how much longer are we going to deal with the pandemic because some people are not taking this seriously and are buying so much stuff where others find getting what they need hard to get like toilet paper, hand sanitizer, and some food items.  I believe some people are greedy and don’t care about anyone else — care about themselves only.  Sad, and I am a little frustrated about it.  I am one of those people who can be snappy happy at times, and that part of me has just started coming out after my antidepressants have changed to 20mg of Celexa and 50mg of Trazadone.  The snappy happy part of me is a part of me I don’t want or like.

Friendship

When it comes to having friends, I find it important to have friends I can trust.  I have DKF and now I LVR (Van Roy).  LVR was a nurse at Mercy Dialysis Center for a year and left about a month ago because she was dealing with some issues at work that could not be resolved.  I feel I made a new friend in LVR.  When she worked at the center, she couldn’t be friends on Facebook, but today we are communicating through texts and phone calls on a daily basis.  Her last day is Thursday as she leaving her new job and I begin a new one in January.  Anyway, our friendship has blossomed and now we talk and chat every day.  I just love LVR.

Nov 302020
 

After almost a month, I took the time to get on my laptop to get my thoughts written.

I forget that I have Grammarly on my iPad keyboard! It’s not the same as the Grammarly I have on my laptop. I have Grammarly premium. Please bear with me as I am using my iPad to write my entries now. I need to get back blogging, dear diary, no matter the time. I am up by 6:15 AM every morning except Sundays. It has been a rough week last week and yesterday. When my schedule is interrupted/changed, I feel lost and get emotional. Today, Monday, November 30, 2020, I am sitting at home getting my emotions leveled. I am doing what I can in the meantime and glad that I have today to breathe. Please bear with me for a while. I believe that the COVID pandemic is getting to me because all I do is go to dialysis three times a week, get out to do laundry with DKF before or after dialysis on Tuesdays, and that depends on what is happening that day. My laundry gets done every other week. During the holidays between Thanksgiving and New Year’s, I find that my emotions are going everywhere. I dealt with anxiety and panic last week. The residue has run into today, but I am feeling better now. I will not talk about what happened last week because it will bring on feelings of insecurity. I will say this: my anxiety and panic I dealt with the past week was at its worst, and I have not felt it in several weeks. I will be fine. I had a minor setback.