I had dialysis this morning for 3 ½ hours. My catheter was not pulling very well or hardly at all. Learning this, I began to feel the feeling of “brain loop” beginning to happen again. The thought of not finding a place for another fistula (as my fistula placement in 2016 did not mature like it should have and died within ten months after it was placed), and/or the finding of a place for a graft came to mind. I kept telling myself “it is not going to happen again today…not today” so I began to ask questions and waiting to see what was going to happen before I left the clinic after having dialysis treatment. I asked P (male)what the hey were going to put in my catheter. It was called Cath Flow. Cath Flow helps catheters get unclogged from any possible blood clots forming in and near the catheter. When P explained it to me he said, “it is heparin with a drug that works like Drano to get the clots in the catheter.” No doubt he got me to laugh. That ended the “brain loop” from coming to the point of forming and scaring me the rest of the day. I was able to go home with a happy face despite the fact that I was worried about my urine infection.