aged. what to do, how to dress, how to behave…
apparently, i just don’t care. i’m sitting here in underarmour wear listening to led zeppelin while having a cup of coffee, on this friday, my day off.
no make-up, no done up nails.
pack my ass away when i consider the polyester stretchy waistline pants.
another leg doc appt today. if i find no relief, it’ll be my last appt there.
work was tough this week. i’m (as usual) exhausted.
middle-aged women: i’m supposed to be unhappy in comparison to the overall population. i’m supposed to be more suseptible to strokes. high stressed, with an ever increasing waistline…okay, so the waistline thing might be occurring, but i’ll soon get a handle on that. as for the rest? well, happiness is relative. i’m happy in the work i do, but i need to have more “after work” time. i’m better off financially, but have no dependents other than my kitty,
i worry about my aging Mom, but have 8 other siblings to rely on…
happiness. i find it where/when i can. i find it in my relatively decent health, in the wonderful pieces of music i possess and can play whenever i choose. i find it in the comfort of this tiny little apt, that is mine alone. in the freedom to come and go as i please with the choice of driving or walking. i find it in the simple fact that after 8 years, 4 trolls, and 2 huge let downs writing here at dd, i’ve made one really good friend and still apparently draw the “past” idiots here to read my entries. may the assholes be annoyed that i continue to write! (you know who you are!)
because: i could be caught up in a dead-end relationship, spending money for lousy sex, living in a damp little basement, regretting the loss of my health and youth while cleaning off the crayon marks left by a little one.
one woman’s heaven, is another woman’s hell.