and what do you follow-up with after the previous entry? do i write about the sad little hole in my heart? the crying reserved for after work hours? the irrational worrying over how cold she’ll be buried in the ground? the panic attacks that i may have made a mistake and should have waited longer?
the hard truth is that life goes on. people will hustle and bustle through this holiday season regardless of my little tragedy thanksgiving 2007. it happened when Dad died. it’s happening after my sweet girl was euthanized. it’ll happen when it’s my time.
and this is why: when i love, i love BIG. even when the guy is wrong. even when my sisters and brothers upset or anger me. this is why when i get hurt, i hurt big. men have flattened me. friends have flattened me. pets flatten me. other people’s pet flatten me. but love runs the blood that fattens the arteries and veins and makes everything 3-D again.
she was the sweetest, most innocent living creature in my life. i will miss her but she’s home now, put back where i found her, with Mom watching out for her and the stray kitties playing over head.