Sep 292005
 

“Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius”
Fulton J. Sheen

the writing on the wall…

long overdue.
i don’t know where i am at this point… i’ve gone long past the dot dot dot, away from the mooning on stars and glitter wonderkinda girl… i’m older, wiser is questionable. i’m more determined, but my feet keep getting caught in the mud. and still i manage to lift them and move them forward. release me. release me. i say, i said…

where are you? where is the good ole gang? done gone packed up the tent, piled into the truck and moved on…

the long trek home, across the universe, things don’t flow so easily. things don’t come so well… saturn’s rings aren’t listening…jupiter’s moons don’t give a damn…

but still, i’m attracted to wax wings and long lost loves. i’ll fly just a little too close to the heat, think of things that make me blush. i’ll always want to find you and never see you again.

still.

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Sep 182005
 
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Sep 092005
 

i can’t watch or read anymore, it breaks my heart. here are a few links to organizations fighting the good fight… and for what it’s worth, i think the Red Cross needs to examine how they run their show. Reality is that most people love their pets and wanting to keep them safe shouldn’t be an issue. it’s high time the Red Cross join forces with organizations that help pets during disasters. There are many of us…far from our families who depend on our pets for companionship…at the very least, they should be able to depend on us to be safe and healthy.

IFAW

UAN

Humane Society

Have a plan!

Houston SPCA

Sep 082005
 

i could offer an opinion about new orleans, hurricane disasters, preparedness, but really? would it matter? my only comment at this point, past the anger, frustration, sadness, and more sadness at the state of humanity is:

this all sucks.

and

in the end, what does it matter really?

i guess at 40, i’ve resolved myself to the fact that i can only take care of my little corner of the world. charity? my charity is riding public transportation for more than half of my life and not adding to the pollution and mass consumption of fuel. my charity is placing the garbage i generate into a garbage can, buying items with minimal amount of packaging, turning lights off when not in use, turning the water off while i brush my teeth…

i show up for work on time, leave when i’m supposed to, make up time even off the clock, follow the rules and regulations laid down by my employer, and even follow rules and laws (albeit grudgingly at times)laid down by my country, my state, my town. i care for my pets, don’t add to the stray population by having them spayed/neutered, practice preventive care that spares me large bills that things not taken care of generate…

i generally take care of myself…don’t do drugs, have a beer probably once a year at this point. i keep myself relatively fit and try not to add to the burden on health insurance which only raises premiums for everyone… i try to buy local produce, look for American made products, if only they would make an affordable, fuel efficient car…

charity.
there is something to be said for the almighty dollar. it provides the quick guilt fix…here, have a dollar and ignore my SUV, my impatient driving, my lack of consideration for the strays on the corner, my blind eye turned at the minority whose work application ended up in the trash or the white elderly woman who was raped at the nursing home…

dollars can do work.

basic human decency, caring and sharing can go a hell of a lot farther. until mankind realizes that treating eachother with respect and decency can only generate good will towards one another, we will continue to require massive amounts of cash donations to get through shit like Katrina.

i am not perfect…but i strive to be a decent person and when i die, i hope to leave the least amount of negative impact on my corner of the world. that’s the best i can do but as the years go by, i find it’s getting tougher to remain optimistic.

i find myself wanting to just hang out with the ponies at the behavior lab. being there watching the stallions stomp and rear (show-offs that they are) and the babies run and play…well, that was about as close to heaven as i’ve been… that, and sitting at the kitchen table with Mom, having coffee and talking early in the morning.