Impressions

At the Poor Man’s Starbucks today, my timespan there a little later than usual because I slept in on this cold, rainy day.

Looks like Glenn, the store manager, is officially “Sandy” and legally a woman now. Dressing the part, too.

Didn’t get to talk to 18-year-old James. He came out and took his break just one table in front of where I was sitting, but totally ignored me. I ignored him for the most part, too, as I was engrossed in my book.

But I did notice the rap star wannabe, the kid with the short dark hair and glasses, when he came in. He sat at the big counter in the center of the dining room, the one with the TV. When it appeared he was ready to leave, he walked in my direction like he was going to throw out his trash in the container just behind me, shot me a brief look, then abruptly turned around and walked in the other direction. What was that all about?

I saw 17-year-old Matthias sitting outside on the ledge, just beyond the window at my seat, dressed in a reddish hoodie. I’ve noticed that whenever he’s sitting in the dining room, he always turns his head and looks at me whenever I walk by. I wonder what he’s thinking? Is he attracted to me? And he always flashes me this killer smile whenever he’s behind the counter and waits on me, like he did yesterday.

He’s cute, but he’s just too young. And this afternoon while sitting out on the ledge by himself, he was smoking cigarillos and spitting gobs of goo all over the place, right in my line of sight. What a turnoff! I found it rather offensive, actually.

Sometime later on, he was sitting in the dining room with a friend, near the front door, and as I walked past him on the way to the restroom I think he shot me a greeting, but I’m not entirely sure.

Boys, boys everywhere… and I love and hate them all. It’s just something I’m going through right now, something I have to deal with. I want them all to shower me with attention, and yet at the same time I often feel contemptuous toward them.

I wish I had more money. If I did, I would dump McDonald’s and start hanging out at the Root Cafe every day for my caffeine fix. I bet I’d meet a more interesting crowd over there. Hipsters and such. Young, but a little older than all these McDonald’s crew guys. People who are perhaps going places in life.

I attended a poetry reading last week, at some hole-in-the-wall art gallery on Madison. I waited until the last minute to walk in because everyone was standing around and I didn’t want to mingle. I listened to some rather boring poetry (in my opinion) by the featured guest, then left without speaking to anyone. At least it was free.

I should try my hand at writing more poetry, get my feelings out and on paper. I haven’t written any since those two workshops back in April led by Patrick’s girlfriend Leanne.

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I haven’t written here in awhile because there hasn’t been much new to tell. I still go home in the evenings as late as I can and just make a beeline to my room without speaking to anyone else in the house except for maybe a brief Hello to whomever I encounter. Watch the 11:00 newscast plus a few sitcom reruns before going to bed. Oh, and I did find out we do have wifi again. Nobody had told me and I didn’t know for three full weeks until one night Keinya handed me a new remote for the cable. The cable guy had had to replace it as they needed to do some adjustments because the cable and wifi weren’t in sync. Or something like that. So I can watch videos online in my room again. So there’s that. Otherwise, my life has been pretty boring.

There are still a few bedbugs around, but they’re much reduced in number. And don’t seem to be multiplying. I’ve been sleeping very well. Even though the current air mattress I’m using keeps collapsing.