A new week has begun

Happy Monday.  A new week has begun.

I had the condo in Reston inspected over the weekend, on Saturday.  It went well, mostly.  But the HVAC is about 60 years old and triple it’s expected lifespan.  But, apparently the condo association will take care of that.  I hope they do, because it was not really functional during the home inspection.

I had two dates this weekend.  I met a guy named Vatana on Saturday and a guy named Richard on Sunday.  It went ok with both of them, I had a nice time with them both.  But I don’t think I’d see either one again.  I think Richard felt the same way about me because he hasn’t texted or anything since yesterday lol.  Which is fine.  I’m only a little offended lol.  And Vatana has only texted a few times since Saturday… so I don’t think he’s very interested either.  Yeah…

I’ve been thinking about giving N a third shot.  He still texts me everyday and apologizes a lot and says he loves me.  I’m not sure how I feel about him or a possibility of a future together, what with his ex being so persistent…

I think I’m pretty much over P.  I think I made it clear to him last week that I still had feelings for him, and he did not reciprocate, and that’s fine.  It’s not meant to be and I’m ok with that now.  Do I want to hear about his successes in dating?  No.  But, I’m at least no longer agonizing about “what if he still actually likes me?”

Things were actually pretty good at work today.  I shadowed little Anthony today as he helped me resolve issues with the GF1 system.  I actually solved a problem we had with not being able to log into the IPMI with the default username and password.  So that was quite exhilarating.

I really don’t know if this love thing is ever going to happen for me.  I think I’ve gone on too many dates at this point.  Talked to too many men online.  Been ghosted too much.  Ghosted others too much.  It doesn’t work.  Nothing I try works.  Yeah… I’m pretty sad about that… my heart hurts.  There’s a really deep seated hopelessness in my soul that has been reinforced over and over and over.  I don’t know what else to do from here.

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