Attention Retarded Goodwill Shoppers!!

I swear EVERYONE that shops at Goodwill is retarded. This one lady in the store today (I’ve seen her before, but never really watched her like I did today) talks to herself and acts like she’s drunk. I think she went into the bathroom and smoked too. The back smelled disgusting for at least two hours. Before this, though, I went into the bathroom to blow my nose (as I was frequently doing..the dust really bothered me today) and I walked past the first stall into the handicapped bathroom because someone was in the other stall. As I walked past, I saw out of the corner of my eye a woman sitting on the toilet with the door wide open. I’m sure she saw me, or at least heard me come in. And she never ONCE made a move to close the door. I walked out of the handicapped stall, and the door still wasn’t closed. That’s just disgusting.

On my way home from work I was pretty hot, so I rolled down my window all the way. It’s kind of chilly outside, but it felt good because I was hot at work. The smells of the outdoors always make me think of last summer and, of course, James. I really wish I had just never said anything about liking him to anyone. I wish I could go back a year and do it all over again with the knowledge I have now. I could’ve just avoided the whole embarrassing situation, and I would be a lot happier now.

Alain locked his keys in his trunk today, I guess it was. He e-mailed me a few times to tell me this and to tell me to call him. I called him about 24 times and he wasn’t there. Then around 6:10 he showed up at my door. While I was waiting for him, I was talking to this kid Nate. He lives in Forest Hills. He said his grandma lives on Wolfe Ave., which is just a few blocks from my house. When he told me this, I figured he wanted to meet me or something, but he didn’t say that directly. The kid sounds kind of kewl, but I just talked to him for the first time on Friday on AIM. He was really nice in the first few emails and seemed unsure of himself. He asked if it was ok to be emailing me and he said he didn’t want to bother me. I thought that was cute.. I would like to meet him, but I’m too scared. He’ll think I’m ugly and then Alain will break up with me..

Alain is going to “Fright Farm” on Tuesday. Which pisses me off. Not just because I’ll be alone all night and I’ll be worrying about him all night too, but mainly because he didn’t invite me once. I think it’s just really rude to talk about an event that you and all your friends are going too to another friend of yours and never invite them.

Aftermath

Just got back from school. The workshop went ok. Half the class wasn’t even there. That just made it easier on me. I asked the two people I expected to ask. Dong Chen and that really big girl next to me lol. Dong Chen actually asked me first, so that made it really easy. I drove home with a sick feeling in my stomach. I didn’t read any of the comments yet. I’m kind of scared to. I don’t want to read anything negative. Oh well, I guess it will just make me stronger and better able to let people read my writing without this overwhelming feeling of self consciousness. These workshops may be good for me. Who knows?

(Later)

URGH! Idiots! The fat girl next to me, I KNEW she was a dumbass. I quoted someone that said eerie and she made a note saying “Is that spelt wrong?” Hhahaha no! But spelt is spelled dear. Dictionary definition of spelt:

A short, indefinite period of time.

Informal. A period of weather of a particular kind: a dry spell.



One’s turn at work.

A period of work; a shift.

Australian. A period of rest.

Informal. A period of physical or mental disorder or distress: a dizzy spell.

Informal. A short distance.

Grr. Dong Chen is also an idiot. My writing: The police officers in these areas will be armed with noise meters and will focus special efforts on writing summons, towing cars and making arrests. He underlined special efforts and says “like what.” And at the end writes “no conclusion,” as if I don’t know that. I knew workshops were a waste of my time. Fuck English class.

J. R. R. Tolkien is Cool, But English Sucks

I went to a discussion about J. R. R. Tolkien and the Lord of the Rings. It was really interesting. Even though the seats were hard as fuck and I was completely uncomfortable. It got me interested enough to want to read The Hobbit book that I bought a long time ago.

I hate my English 15 class. Tomorrow we have a workshop for our papers. I don’t feel comfortable with other people reading my paper. Especially people I don’t know. I don’t see the point. These kids don’t know any more about English and grammar than I do. Plus its just embarrassing to be the only person in that class that doesn’t know at least one other person. But that’s just how it’s always been for me… :( I’m really nervous about it to tell the truth. I hope it goes ok and I don’t embarrass myself completely. I hope there’s someone else like me in the class and we can switch papers. *prays to God*..