10 Sep 2002 - Absent : Day 1
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04:51 PM ~ Today was my first absent day of the year (only five days into the school year). I have so much shit to do today, so I decided that I would skip school to finish it. Aren't I such a naughty boy? Even after today I will still have a load of stuff that needs to get done (I need to go clothes shopping a.s.a.p.). School is really starting to piss me off. I'm sick of having my entire existence revolve around it. I wake up at six a.m. to get ready for school. I attend school from nine till three. I go home and do my homework (for school). I sleep (to prepare for school). On the weekends I rest (again, for school). There you have it, the extent of my life. No fun. No games. No social interaction. School is somewhat like a parasite. Slowly devouring everything within you until nothing is left but flesh and bone (assuming of course that this parasite does not eat flesh). After only five days of school I already feel completely jaded. I love my life. Can’t you tell? Current Mood:  Depressed
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10 Sep 2002 - Unpretty
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06:42 PM ~ I'm hate myself. Inside and out. I'm have the most undesirable body. COVERED in stretch marks...on my back, legs, arms, ... pretty much everywhere. I'm overweight. This sure as hell doesn't help my self esteem. Would you love someone who you didn't find attractive? Current Mood: Depressed
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10 Sep 2002 - Powerless
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07:53 PM ~ Have you ever felt like you just wanted to curl up in your bed and lie there forever? Have you ever felt like living for one more second would make you go insane? That is how I am feeling right now. I want for someone to understand, but no one does. My mother seems to think that she is helping me by constantly saying how life is wonderful and that I should be happy, that I can do it. That isn't what I want to hear. I want just one person to understand that unhappy and that filling me with crazy ideas about how things with improve. Is this asking too much? Someone get me some Prozac. Current Mood: Nauseated
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10 Sep 2002 - ...
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10:52 PM ~ I need a friend right now but I have none. When I walk down the halls at school everyone has a smile on their face and a jump in their step. They talk, they laugh. And i'm left alone. All alone. By myself. No one calls me to see how i'm doing. No one asks me to go to the mall. I don't what to do anymore. I've tried, with no success, to make friends. I always fail. No ones loves me. I don't know why it is that everyone else has an entire group of people who enjoy their company, and I can't even make one single friend. The people who do talk to me run off when they see one of their real friends. I honestly can't live a life like this anymore. I don't know what to do. Fuck. Current Mood: Depressed
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