Thinking About Life

Here I am…taking time to write in my diary as 8 PM does come quickly after 6 PM. Even staying up past 8 PM is very hard to do since I always get up between 5 and 6 AM every week day and Saturday morning. It is not easy staying up late when personal cares, cleaning, laundry, and grocery shopping plus errands start at 7 AM every week day morning now I get up at 6 AM Saturday mornings (sometimes 7 AM) to have some personal time before heading to church. I need time for myself before company comes over now. Sundays are my sleep in until 8 AM sort of days (sometimes 9 AM). I do not have a set time to write in my diary and I never did. I can do days without writing in my diary if I wanted to and I have done that so many times throughout the years with deardiary.net. My life is boring by any means. My life has a routine and it doesn’t like to have too many interruptions in it. When something is thrown off schedule, my body does not like it too much, but knowing there are days that have a schedule change, is managed with great care by my IRIS hired workers and their clients.

The other day, Monday evening, before retiring to bed for the night, I had a neighbor visit for a while. We talked about what was going on around here that did involve me — rumor of my moving out. This tenant/neighbor is a sweetheart and I do believe she is telling me the truth about what had been saiid when I had my futon and desk removed from my apartment last month to make room for a new desk and loveseat couch with sleeper. Even though I believe what this tenant has said what was being noticed and talked about, I am leery about other tenants who spread gossip and rumors about this place more than I realize after thinking about it for the past couple of days. This building titled Burbank Plaza Apartment Complex is filled with drama and am in the midst of it all not enjoying it one bit like the other tenants and cliques. I do not want to be any part of a clique here anymore. This summer I have had my windows open only a few times and hated the conversations outside plus the voices of known tenants who do not seem to care what is said. Being the product of gossip and rumor, the tenants are not kind about one moving in or out here. What I know about is when I hear about things, but I do not sit in a group and be a part of their conversation anymore. Why tenants have to have cliques is beyond my comprehension today. It is exactly lime middle and high school crap going on is all. Why I let certain people bother me so much is beyond my kind heart can really understand right now. No more. I need to set my foot down and mind my own business and go on with my life without the other tenants in my apartment from now on — although I have said this many times already as well — I never get a break, do I? Nope.

Time to Write

am finding time to write in my diary. It was a good day even though it rained all day and being out in some of it did not please me too much because getting into the vehicle after shopping at Wal-Mart this morning was an experience I do not care for much. It was not easy getting into the front seat of the vehicle I have gotten in and out of so many times before in the rain. Also, DKF’s granddaughter was with us and she was such a great joy to see and be with for a few hours. She even took a little nap. Although the weather is unpleasant today, it was a good day or at least most of it was good.

The mid of the week is coming and I am looking forward to it. I hope the weather is not so rainy as it was today and yesterday all day. The rain ims most needed though. Also, I have noticed that August is flying by so quickly. Before we know it, it is going to be September and the months of fall will follow. Where did August go? With 10 1/2 days left now, August will be gone for a whole year until 2019. I know I have been busy watching someone’s son/grandson this month so far, have seen and been around another little one all day today, I do find that my days go by more quickly when busy. Yet, some days do not go fast enough, but I cannot argue about it right now — this minute in time. Take it one day at a time is what I need to do right now and that os exactly what is happening.

I did not take my phone with me awhile I was shopping at Wal-Mart this morning. I had a little girl with me, along with her grandma who happens to be my IRIS hired worker DKF. It was also raining and I am very protective of my phone. While I was away, my friend HE called me to let me know that she has six months+ to live with her cancer. I do feel for her and her family, but she did not have to leave a message like that on my voicemail for me to hear. I am not dealing with her being sick too well right now. What right does a doctor have to tell a patient that they Twhave so much time left when they really do not know themselves? God is the only one who knows our plans in life because He is the one who has shaped our lives. My heart aches yet again. The nurse in DKF told me that HE does not really know. I know God knows.

For the longest time now, I have to admit, that I have been wanting to change what I write in journal/diary for a long time. What to change, add. Share, and say is one of the hardest things to do when it comes to planning and sharing with others all over the world online at any site like DearDiary.net and deardiary.org, or any other social site that is out there. I have seen and heard so much hatred on facebook.com, twitter.com, and other social sites, it makes me cry a lot. What I share on such special sites have made people come and go so many times, it is heartbreaking that not everyone can be friends when political disputes occur. It is a very sad situation and knowing that times are not going to get any better, but hope still remains tight in my hear.

It is getting late and bed time is a few minutes away now, so I will continue writing in my diary tomorrow or another day. Good night and God bless.