A Few Words o to be Said Right Now…

A few words or more have to be said and I am about ready to spill my guts out once again. Okay…

here it goes…

I will no longer waste a tear, waste any anger, have a broken heart or have the feeling of being hurt because of people who choose not to give me the time of day. If communication is not an option or even happening why bother worrying about those people when I have a life to live that is my own and they choose not to be a part of so they are no longer a part of my world anymore. People have choices to make and whatever the choice being made has its consequences and rewards. My reward is, now…

seriously…

is a happier world without the constant knowledge that I have done something wrong every time I am in the picture AFTER I am out of the picture.

I am a happier person knowing that I am not in a constant watch of what is being said or done while i am not in certain people’s life If certain people do not want to have communication with me or other people the so be it. I do not need to be in constant fear anymore. For the past two years so much stress has been released and non-existent because I have walked away from negativity and the crap that the negativity has caused — a constant edge in my own life that proved to be tension.

Another reward I have is knowing that I am safe and able to move on in my own world… I HAVE TO VE SAFE in my own world.

I will not walk away from family like some people have in their lives. It is downright stupid to have problems in the family and not be able to communicate openly and rationally. I will no longer…

seriously…

talk to liars
talk to control fanatics
talk to people who can not stand up for themselves
talk to people who give ultimatums
talk to people who will NOT (seriously) take the time of day to listen to me about what I have to say
talk to people who do not allow the past to be left where it belongs — in the past
talk to people who believe that I am a liar, a thief, or manipulator …

People can go do those things to other people and stay away from me from now on. I have walked on egg shells and felt threatened too many years so it is going to stop. I am not going to shed a tear, get angry or pissed off, or even give anyone the time of day anymore. Certain people are no longer a part of my life and I will not allow certain people back in my life again. Certain people are dead to me and so it is over….completely over. I am not wasting my time or energy with certain people.

Anyone who is spying on me will have a joyous read. I am smiling because I have said my piece of mind and I am not backing down or repeating myself, and also, I am not going to care anymore except for those who do understand.

This is my journal…this is my place…no one is going to tell me to delete anything here because it upsets them because I have every right to write my thoughts, feelings, and moments anytime I choose. This is MY journal!!! Those who love to spy on me, God is watching you. You will pay for your actions sooner or later.

I have every right to…..

speak my mind!

12:17 a.m.

I am still up. I am ready to hit the hay pretty much now. Bing has had his time at the living room window tonight and he watched someone come in. Seriously I thought I heard a person meowing at Bing earlier tonight, lol. Oh well! You do not meow at Bing because he knows what our language is and meowing is Bing’s job because he is a cat and cat’s meow, lol. Oh well, if that person did meow, let them be the silly one, right?!

I am tired so I will be heading to bed shortly after I get done watching the Law & Order: CI episode that is on right now (a recording from the 27th of April I did not watch yet. It will be over in a few minutes now. If the weather is reasonable later today, I will be back … if not Saturday for sure if the weather is reasonable.

Good night!