Seriously…Sometimes I Wonder to This Day…

I live in one place where gossip and rumors are very serious a problem. I wonder what fuels other people to be hurtful and mean to someone behind their backs and then sweet and kind to their faces. It makes me want to puke and throw up with disgust and anger. No gossip or rumors have been said about me …. I do not care anymore anyway. What I do not hear won’t hurt me anyway, but I do know there are tenants in the building who would want me out of here … living on the 1st floor now has its advantages now and the stress in my life has been diminished to a bearable standard of a normal life … a life now where sleep is an all night thing now without too many interruptions throughout the night. I have been waking up with the urge to run to the bathroom when i first wake up now instead of at 11 p.m., 3 a.m., and 7 a.m.. Now I wake up at 7 a.m., and again at 9 a.m. to run to the bathroom, lol…unless I stay up. If I could, I would sleep until noon but my body won’t do that anymore now that I have moved to the 1st floor and I hear neighbors leaving from the back parking lot every morning, lol. Just some people, in this building, are people of a nature I wish not to be a part of.

Because of the bull crap that goes on around here, in I personally stay away and out of the activities such as bingo night, and playing cards. The same people play bingo and the same people play cards and that can get a little boring when the same people play bingo or cards. I have even vowed to avoid certain people and only be civil to them when I see them. I do not even pick up the phone to LS anymore because of the fact that she calls me on stupid stuff that is a repeat from the last phone call or complains about one person over another. In fact … today LS called me earlier this afternoon telling me that her hairdresser has been trying to call me but can not get a hold of me. I have been home most of the time and check my phone for messages and calls of those who do not leave messages … no phone calls from her hairdresser. It pissed me off for a few minutes and then I let it go thinking of not calling LS or her hairdresser to get a hair trim from her hairdresser. I was not thrilled to be lied to over an answering machine. I have not, for the longest time, answered the phone when LS calls me lately. I do not care to get involved in her life anymore as long as she is friends with a gentleman with violent tendencies.

J do not believe in New Year resolutions anymore because resolutions are made and then broken but I have made a couple of resolutions that will stick and those resolutions are as follows:

1. losing weight and,

2. staying away from NMS, LS, JT, MM1, MM2, MW, and anyone involved with the clan following JL and her husband TL.

Otherwise New Year resolutions do not stick with me. I do not care to discuss the two in great depth either even though this is my place … my readable diary at Deare Diary. My world is not filled with stress anymore and if it is not stress-free entirely … the stress is very bearable and controlled.

Tomorrow I see my psychiatrist for a med check.