I have something to say that has been on my mind since this afternoon and no I am not mad at anyone here at DD or here where I live, but I am hurting as if my heart was torn right out of my body and stomped, making me realize that my trust in people is being worked on right now and I am no longer taking trust for granted anymore. I have to walk away from some people because trust is such a big deal for me and my friendships I do have left have been carefully analyzed. Trust and friendship means a lot to me but if someone has misplaced their trust with me, it will take a lot to get the trust back … if that is even possible in such a cruel world. Seriously, I have to walk away from more people I thought I could trust but realize now I cannot trust anymore. Sad I know it, but I can no longer take anymore disappointment and be able to deal with it at the same time I am attending my last four weeks of college. I have always suffered from a bout of depression and I have done my best — my very best — to climb up from the bottom of the depression barrel and get to the top but after today, I have taken a few steps back down to analyze more about trust. I have a major trust issue and I am going to have to work hard on that imperfection in my life.
So much has gone on lately in my life today that today I have learned that I will no longer will be speaking to someone at all. Trust is definitely big issue and when it has been misplaced, it takes a lot to get it back and believe me, some people will have to get on their hands and knees and beg for forgiveness for putting me a place they helped put me in.