It has been a while since I wrote in my journal/diary but I have been so busy with school and Prophecy Seminar meetings at our Christian Elementary School. I do not even remember when the last time I wrote in my diary here, but that does not matter. Anyway, it has been a fine few days, busy with life in general. Right now I am taking a break from my busy day to say hello to all my diary friends and say a few words. Not much going on right now. Even though it is 9 a.m. in the morning, I feel like being lazy and sleep, but I don’t dare. I am at my friend’s place for the day and night and will be going home tomorrow. I have a busy schedule this weekend as well, and school is not just what is going to be the only thing keeping me busy. My friend KW is going to do special music at our Prophecy Seminar meeting tomorrow night and then Saturday for supper and our evening, we will be going to Blackhawk Technical College to an Awards Banquet. KW is getting an award and I had promised I would be there for her to cheer her on. I never been to an awards banquet since the eighth grade so I know I am going to have a lot of fun and excitement all around me. I will probably be a little anxious at the same time but I won’t let it rule over me as long as I can help it.


I thought I would write a quick hello and let you all know that everything is going good here. I still have not gotten the call from this person yet but I am no longer worried about it. This person has proven to me what a real friend he is. If he wants to associate with my other friends so be it, but he has caused a lot of questions in my head regarding what is going to happen next as far him hurting my friends again. I have no sympathy for this person anymore and I do not wish to be friends with him any longer. He has proven to me what a big jerk he can be and still is. Some people never learn and I have a feeling he is exactly one of those people in this world. He does not want to cross me. If he acts like a total jerk, he will be told that and I will be the one to say it if it ever happens in front of me. How dare he say he is going to call me and never does. I do not have any respect for liars, whiners, and jerks. I do not want to waste whatever breath I have anymore. I will remain true to my true friends.


Hi KBabe. I do not understand or know why someone would be hurtful as some people are. It is really scary and definitely not worth it being friends with someone like that. I will concentrate on my true friends go from there and not let the person who hurt me get me down. I have so much going on for me right now in my personal life – school and friendships, and family. I do not have children and I am not married, but I do have a life I need to live and be happy. Have a great day!

What Can I Do Or Say?

One of the hardest things for me to do sometimes is to express my thoughts and feelings at the same time. One of the feelings I am dealing with right now is a hurt. This past weekend has proven to me how hurt I can really get when it comes to friends being hurt by another friend. I do not understnd why people can be so mean and nasty one minute and then be nice the next. I have learned what true friends do for friends and what friends should not be doing to other friends. Yes, I iam hurting inside right now and believe me it is all because of a friend hurting my friends very badly and I was also put into the equation. I have realized who my true friends are and who are not my friends this past weekend and beieve me…I no longer can trust a certain someone who I considered a friend. A friend would not hurt another friend’s feelings like this guy did. What I do not get is the fact that this friend has apologized to four of my friends but hasn’t had the decency to call apologize to me for what he has saud about me behind my back. Teasing me about my body odor is hurtful yes, and believe me I am mad and wanting to scream and soay a few choice words to this guy who I once considered a friend, but after what I have learned of what he has done to my friends and myself, he is not a friend indeed nd my feelings for him have really gone down the tubes. I will forgive this guy for saying and doing what he has done to me and my friends but I will not forget what he has said and done. Because of what has happened over the weekend, I can no longer even think of speaking to this guy or eevn having any kind of association with him. He has every right to be afraid of me right now and it will take time for me to cool down and feel good about myself again. He has told my friends he will call me but he has not even bothered to do so yet and believe me, I am not holding my breath for his phone call. I really dislike what this guy has done and said. Why do people have to be so mean, cruel, nasty, nice, and happy at the same time. I do not know why I wamt to say this, “I hope he rots in his own persona; hell alone and realize that what he has done and said will give him no gain in anything in his life.” This guy is so lazy and does not have any room in criticisiing and being so mean to friends whatsoever. I do know that this guy will be answering to God one day and I know that it is not going to be a happy timie being judged by God for any action said or done by everyone who goes to heaven one day.

I feel I have ranted and raved on a very touchy subject and may have gotten a little confused and lost in my thoughts from time to time. My world right now is cluttered with a lot of things right now and believe me when I say I do not have any time to be down in the dumps hurting so badly in my heart. I need to concentrate on my schoolwork, my friends, my apartment, and the entire world around me. I do not have time to be depression and sad believe me I have a lot going or me right now and it will continue. I can not afford to have to sleepless nights, sleeping during the day all day long, and emotional problems that can drive me insane from time to time. I do not noeed my emotions being so mixed up and playing their major roles in my world of happines. I can not allow my emotions to be going up and down every minute. My heart can not take it. I have had so much hurt in my life as it is. Growing up was not easy for me at all. People can be so mean and nasty and prove to others how wonderful they really can be at times and this one guy has proven to me that he can not trusted and right now my respect for him is gone. I do not know what else to say right now, really. I am still healing from the hurt I have felt for the past few days, and I am mad indeed.

A Quick Entry

I really do not have a whole lot to say. The entry before this one, which is for my friends at DD only, pretty much says it all what happened this past weekend. I will be heading home from KW’s shortly as I am not needed to be JW’s companion today. I will be JW’s companion next Thursday and will be spending the night then. It will be so good to get away from my apartment building for a few hours. Anyway, with a lot going on for the next five weeks, I am now busy with my third class at University of Phoenix Online. I am heading towards a fine five weeks of homeowrk, reading, studying, and communication between classmates and instructor. My third class is MGT331 – an continuation of my 2nd class MGT330. It looks like a lot of fun as well as a bit overwhelming but who doesn’t get overwhelmed from time to time with anything in their life? I really enjoy attending classes online and being very active even when I feel being active in class is a waste of my time and energy. Let me put it this way, some days I do not have the energy or the wants to go to class but I go anyway. I feel bored otherwise. Only having five days off between classes was a wonderful break, but I could have used two more days. University of Phoenix changed their class start dates to Tuesday from Thursday. i think those two days lost was somewhat confusing. I am ok with it now though. I really like the idea of starting classes closer to the beginning of the week than towards the end. It does help.

I know that I am a little confused right now, lol. I will be back later. I will be going home shortly. Good bye for noow.


It has been a very interesting few days. In fact a lot of emotion has been shared between me and four other dear friends. I really can not express my hurt any further than the fact that I thought a friend was a friend and really has proven quite the opposite. Yes, I have been deeply hurt and the trust with this friend has been misplaced and my respect for this friend has been dwindled down to nothing basically. Just seeing my friends hurt and knocked down with words that hurt really has taken its toll on me. Yes I am hurting and yes I am not a happy camper – I am mad and upset. I have learned who my true friends are and believe me I do know that this one male friend is not a true friend. In fact I do not consider this person a friend right now. I am going to have to stay away from this person and regain my composure and find my happiness once more. My happiness has been coming and going in the past few days. U thought that Tuesday I was dealing with depression because all I wanted to do was sleep all day long. Did I sleep all day long? No, I did not because I had to go to class. My 3rd class at University of Phoenix started up on Tuesday morning, and I needed to go to class that day to let my instructor know I was there and doing what I needed to do.


This is a quick hello. I will be going to church shortly. I am over at KW & JW’s place this morning. Spent the night last night and slept in their recliner all night long. It was comfortable, but when I woke up this morning, I found myself sitting upright and believe me, I thought I broke the chair but didn’t thankfully. I am sorry this is so short.


This is a quick hello. I will be going to church shortly. I am over at KW & JW’s place this morning. Spent the night last night and slept in their recliner all night long. It was comfortable, but when I woke up this morning, I found myself sitting upright and believe me, I thought I broke the chair but didn’t thankfully. I am sorry this is so short.

Some Thoughts Before Retiring For the Night

It has been one of those days where my thoughts are just choppy and somewhat do not make sense for some reason. My entries so far today have been short and a few words at two different times. I was not home when I wrote the last two entries of this day. I was at KW and JW’s waiting for time to pass to go meet JW at the bus stop by his work place and when I did leave at 2:45 p.m. to get the bus, JW was already on the bus getting off. He had come home from work practically an hour before he would have originally. I was practically shocked through my skin. Why JW came home an hour earlier is yet beyond me. Oh well.

For some reasn, I had one of thosoe days that time went by on the slow side. Even though time was on the slow side today, I did have a good day. I was so glad to get away from my apartment building and spending the day and my time with JW until KW got home from school. I even stayed, upon request, until 6 p.m. and got home an hour later than my usual schedule. No big deal. I enjoyed the extra hour at their place. I love being JW’s companion and company on Thursdays so much. JW is such a neat guy and I am glad that I know him and his wife well. I love them both so much! Anyway, while I was at their place, I had a good time. During the early part of the afternoon, probably because I was ill for five days and now feel better, I felt so tired that I could barely keep my eyes open when I left. That is such a horrible feeling sometimes. Maybe more strange than horrible anyway.

It is getting late and midnight is soon approaching (4 minutes). I am going to say good night and God bless for now. Have a great Friday night everyone. Keep smiling!