From Reading Other Entries

I am glad that other diarists had a good Easter Sunday w/ their families. I do have to say that the quietness of my home was nice but I was lonely all day. As I said before, plans for the day had fallen through because my friend RH was not feeling well. I did check on my neighbor’s cat earlier and she was fine. I think the rainy weather has affected her a little. She seems to be a little skitterish but otherwise fine. The neigher is planning on coming home tomorrow sometime. Her cat really misses her. As for my Easter Sunday, it was a typical Sunday for me except for the fact that my SIL called for all the kids and brother, I had gotten a call from my Aunt D from Gays Mills, Wisconsin, and I got a call from my friend Mark E. Otherwise it was quiet and I was lazy all day except for the fact I did some dishes and put them away immediately. I now have a headache and I am feeling kind of icky for some reason. i think the lack of sleep has taken its toll or it is beginning to. My Easter Sunday was noot so bad. But because I have been home all day without company or plans to be anywhere, I have been thinking a lot of the Easter Sunday’s I celebrated when I was growing up. A memory that hides in the back of my mind and makes me tear a bit. The memory will be written in my Grandpa Clarence’s Journal. My ID there is peanuts. Grandpa Clarence called me that during my teenage years. I guess my day was not so bad after all, hey? Nope!

Can’t Wait For Tomorrow To Come

Here I am, home alone today. Two wonderful things happened today so far. I had gotten a call from my SIL and family today after calling and leaving a message for them to wish them a happy day – Easter. Then I got a call from my pastor’s wife JS and we talked a while. Plans for the day have been put on hold because my neighbor is not feeling well so he was out of commission for the day so I am spending the day alone in my apartment while families around go be with their families. I wish I was either in Arkansas or Pennsylvania with family. Oh yeah, my Aunt D from Gays Mills called and wished me a happy day as well so really I and three wonderful tnings happen so far. So my day has not been a total disappointment thankfully. It is icky outside yet as I was hoping to go for a walk this afternoon but who wants to go outside into a grayness that is depressing.

I can not wait for tomorrow to come as I have a doctor’s appointmentn to find the right medication for my anxiety and depression that seems to hang on and not let me go. My appoitment at 3 p.m. is a relief to come. I am sick and tired of how I feel in the down mooments of life. We will see what the appointment will do to help. Honestly. this depression really stinks!

The Blahs

I really do not want to do much today. The weather looks icky outdoors as more rain comes and goes. Farmers need the rain indeed but we surely don’t need it for depression and anxiety that has plaqued me for the past two in a half weeks. Tomorrow I am going to see my primary doctor regarding medications for anxiety and depression since it has taken this long to snap out of anxiety and depresssion alone. What fun this really is…NOT! I feel blah and blue today and I have no plans today as today is supposedly Easter Sunday. To be very honest with you, it is just another Sunday today as the other Sundays I have already seen and left behind. Easter is another pagan holiday which rabbits and chicks, and eggs have come into play. The real meaning of the holiday is Jesus and what he did for us by dying on the cross. Every year anyway, Easter is pushed from date to date making Jesus’ death unknown except for the fact that he was crucified on Friday before Sabbath and rested on Sabbath (Saturday) and rose on Sunday, making the Sunday, the day he rose from the dead. I do not want to cause a great big controversy so I am going to end it here. I have no plans for today. The sun is trying to come out to play but I do not know what is going to happen as far as that goes. The weather is rainy and wet and kind of dark in a corner of the sky. It is just an icky day and it has been going on like this since the middle of the week – the threat of rain and thunder as days pass by. I have had too much grayness and want some sunlight now. It is depressing and just blah blah blah. I know I am not the only one who feels icky inside.