I have a huge headache. this is the third night I have not been able to sleep well.. or is it the fourth? There is something weighing very heavily on my mind at the moment and even I am not quite sure what it is. I am not sure where in my head and heart to draw a certain line sometimes… and the following goes for about most of the relationships with people i have right about now. I find myself having the familiar “down” after the passionate plea I made a few days ago in this journal for us to be kind and honest and love one another like family. Everyone. And then just being out there things happen to dampen that faith. G-d? the people in this world sometimes make me so mad! I go to bed dissappointed,
is this your test of me? to se if I can plug along through even when it seems that almost everyone around me is so self absorbed that they forget simple manners, basic consideration, and even more importantly, the fact that we have to put others before ourselves?
my anger at all can be only at one, but even one represents mankind.
mostly dissappointed n myself… becasue i feel like i am failing my own quest to be positive or at least say something positive in the diary every day. I go to bed angry and humans and angry at myself.
goodnight
Life Out Loud
Just another DearDiary.Net site
Don’t let it bring you down,
It’s only castles burning,
Find someone who’s turning
And you will come around…
Hope those flashes don’t come back. Beth, be strong. Be VERY strong. You know you are strong.
I was getting ready to sign off and go to bed, and I came over here as a last stop before clicking the power button…and I am glad I did.
I know what its like to be feeling so rock bottom. You have been hit hard emotionally and you are a deep thinker…deep feeler…deep lover. Its kind of all or nothing with you.
how do I know? Like spirits I think recognize other kindred souls.
You are very empathic… feeling the pain of others…as well as your own…. do you do any meditations bethy?
I don’t as often as I should…but.. I do find I have to ‘ground’ and ‘shield’ myself..when doing bodywork… I pick up alot… and sometimes I get off kilter, trying to figure out whats going on…when simply I have ‘picked’ up another’s energy.. another’s pain… and I have to learn to seperate whats ME and whats theirs..you know what I am saying??
I had better stop..or my comment will be longer than your entry…
Love ya Beth.. ::: handing you a nice cool iced tea and a footrest to prop up your feet, clicks the sunglasses open…. and sits down next to you on a warm sunny beach for awhile!::: MMMMmmmm..