It’s been a while so while I am feeling too awake for bedtime, even though it’s nearly midnight, I thought I would jot a few lines down.

Life has been up and down, I still shed a few tears over the miscarriage and what could have been, but for the most part have accepted it and am trying not to let it scare me off trying again (which we plan on doing when I get back from the USA in May).

I’m scared as hell about leaving Ash and Amelia for 3 weeks while I jet off with my brother to have a holiday, and at times I feel like such a bad mum for doing it, and I know there are people out there who think it too but it’s booked and paid for now so no backing out. I know I will be on the phone home at every opportunity but I am looking forward to meeting some amazing friends I have known for 10 years in some cases.

Work has been driving me crazy lately, I hate every moment I am in that building and count the minutes til I leave, but there is no good reason, there are no horrible people, no bad jobs, I just want out. So we started a business, and it is going well enough that I have requested (and just been approved for) a 4 day week. Starting slowly, but hopefully it will lead to NO more “working” for me soon, and eventually for Ash either. And at the rate mum is selling canvases – for her as well LOL.

Amelia is moving ahead in leaps and bounds, she has learned to write her name in the last couple of days, which I am impossibly proud of and is recognising most of the other letters now as well. Such a clever chicken

Well I am going to bed, have a happy and safe easter break all! Mwah.