So it’s been a rough few days. My job I loved with the reasonably nice people has turned into a nightmare. Yesterday morning I was supposed to have a catch up meeting with my boss SS and she was not available for it. She pulled me into her office later and told me in whispered tones that she still wanted to have a catch up with me that day, but because there were a few attendance issues to talk about she had asked HER boss, J to sit in on it with us. I said okay and went back to my desk. I figured she was going to bring up my sick leave, ask me if something was wrong, was I dying, pregnant,etc. Maybe they had a problem that I had been late to a meeting last week, all things I was prepared to cop and apologise for for (although you can’t really apologise for being sick.. but hey). When I got to the meeting no one was there, I waited, no one came, after a few minutes I went to look for them and they were in J’s office, not SS’s. No one told me about that. First thing SS says is “this is an official meeting, and while it is not an official reprimand, it could well become one, and everything that is discussed will be going on your employment record”. Confused, I nodded and waited for them to continue. She told me they were here to discuss my continual absence from work, 13 days in 6 months, and the fact that I had only provided documentation and filled in the appropriate forms for 4 of those days. I was stunned. I said there is NO WAY I had that many days off work, that is over 2 a month! I reminded my boss that whenever I had a day off she was chasing me within minutes of my return to work to fill in a form for her to sign, which I always did. She sais that’s another thing, she shouldn’t have to chase me… I responded that she chases me within minutes of my return to work, I don’t get a chance to act independently. And in fact this was the first time I had a sick day (Friday) that she hadn’t hassled me, and look, here’s my form AND a medical certificate off my own bat. They started telling me that I had to pay back the company 9 days worth of pay and how was I going to do that? Did I want to cancel my annual leave or have the money deducted from my wages. At this point I asked what days they were and could I please see them? SS started to read them out to me but J stopped her and said they would email them to me. I only heard the first 3 dates, and I know I was sick on the first, but I also know I was there for the other 2 and I filled in a form for the first one. How do I know? Well the first date was SS’s first day with the company and I was sick that day, lousy timing. I presented her with a form to sign as part of our first meeting. That’s day 2. Day 3 we did a server migration of the website which I was there for. I didn’t get to say any of this yet though as I was now crying and this turned into a complete panic attack and I couldn’t breathe. SS started counting and holding my hand to calm me down. I couldn’t stop though and eventually she went and got me a glass of water and I started to recover. I apologised for losing control, but said I am still not well and this is a complete shock to me. I never uite regained my composure. J wanted to postpone the rest of the meeting until another day, but I wanted to get it over with and said keep going. The meeting then turned into a mess, I got defensive and asked them if they wanted me to leave, if they thought I did a bad job in my role, they assured me my work is fine and they are pleased by it. Except for… and started reeling of that I don’t take enough responsibility, I shouldn’t wait for managers to approve things, I should hassle them because if they don’t sign off, it’s MY fault things are delayed, even though my work is done on time. I said that i felt they didn’t think I was doing a good job as I only ever got negative feedback from them and J started going on about how negative feedback is essential, how will I know I fucked things up if she doesn’t tell me huh? And besides she ALWAYS tells me I do a good job. LIES!! She has never once said something nice to me about my work. I knew I should stop talking but stuff just kept coming out and I started crying again, and it was just a mess. It was left that they will email me the dates and havea think about what I wanted to do about it. They still haven’t emailed me the dates and I have left messages asking them to, so i don’t know what’s going on. I spoke to the HR manager from my old work as the one at RSPCA is SS’s best buddy there and he assures me it is all a bit weird, it’s not just me. I have spoken to a couple of legal places and they can’t do much unless they fire me or force me to quit, unless I want to file a bullying complaint, but that has to go through HR first I think. All I can think is they want me to quit, or they want to get me for fraud and fire me. Why, I don’t know. As far as I know I have done nothing wrong and I have been wracking my brains trying to work it out. I am so upset, I really hate that this is happening to me. Reallyfuckinghateit. I’m sure I will find when I see the dates that I was in the office on most, if not all of those days, and the ones I wasn’t that I either filled in a form or made up the day on a different day. Which is fine, but it means i am going to make my boss out to be al iar and she is going to hate that, which means work is going to be horrible form now on. No matter what happens I am going to have to leave, it’s just a matter of my terms or theirs. Either way it is not far and I feel sick about it.
Monthly Archives: July 2008
Party!
Ash is out playing poker with some guys from his course and I have just put Amelia to bed and am now sitting here wondering what to do with myself… should I read, play a game, watch a movie? Or just piss away the time with drivel here? Drivel it is. My birthday was a big success, everyone had a ball. We scoured op shops and junk shops for everything we could possibly need for a senior citizens hoedown. We didn’t manage to play bowls as the budget wouldn’t stretch to include it but we did have Bingo, Checkers, Backgammon, cards, a jigsaw puzzle and some theming with nanna rugs, free medication upon arrival, with 2 choices, the hard stuff or the placebo (vodka jelly shots or mini m&m’s) in little pill cups. I also made up old people name tags so everyone had to choose a name on arrival. My mum bought an old style hors d’oeuvre holder which was dressed with toothpicks containing kabana, pickled onions and cheese and a very scary fashion. Most people dressed up and although some people went to a lot more effort than others, everyone seemed to get into the spirit of the evening. I even got old themed presents wracking up a haul of mini gin bottles, boiled lollies, $5 in a card, some Christmas bath confetti, a Christmas ornament and a very very ugly statue from the op shop. Taking the cake was a box of suppositories from H (containing no tablets, but a most welcome gift voucher!), he even tried to convince the chemist to make up a fake prescription label to go on them but he refused. I thoroughly expected all the games to be just props as people talked and maybe danced, but no one danced except me and kitty and all the games were played, the jigsaw even got finished. My friends are weird, but I love them! Everyone brought heaps of food, and I cooked all day on the Friday, but it all got eaten. I got a little tipsy and vaguely remember eating lasagne at 4am when we got home! Here’s a photo slideshow from the night for those who aren’t on my FB friend list.
In other news, we are still slowly improving the house and I’m still wondering what to do about my job – should I stay and struggle financially or go and most likely do a job I hate to make the money we need??? It’s a tough decision. Amelia has taken to singing a lot lately, here’s her version of Baa Baa Black Sheep… ‘baa baa black sheep uni wool yessir yessir yessir yessir yessir bags full one master dame lane’ It’s so impossibly cute. She also sings Round and round the garden, Row row row your boat, Teddybear teddybear, Twinkle twinkle little star and a few others. She can count to ten now although she frequently misses out eight, and she’s starting to recognise some letters of the alphabet. Each day she makes me shake my head in wonder as she learns something new, and when she says “fanks mummy” when I give her something, or “ta much daddy” it’s so cool. We’ve taught her please and thankyou, excuse me, bless you, she’s a polite little thing. Until she headbutts you in the groin while yelling “crash mummy” and giggling her head off. She loves being tickled and is animal crazy. Driving home from the country last weekend she was nearly wetting herself (actually she may well have been, hehe) with excitement every time we went passed a sheepybaa or a moocow. Today we went past a circus that was packing up and despite my moral objections to animals in circuses, we had to stop and let Amelia see the elephants, camels and ponies in the paddocks. It was definitely a highlight for her, one of the ponies sniffed her hand and ate grass out of it. She looked delighted. When I am sick (like now) she tries to put me to bed and rubs my head saying “poor mummy, go bed now”. Don’t get me wrong though, she can also me a mega pain in the butt and an absolute brat when she wants to be, but it is not very often and it doesn’t usually last long. She fell down and broke her front tooth a little while ago which led to her first dentist trip, she thinks the dentist chair is a slide and when I went back the other day for my check up (after being guilted into it during Amelia’s appointment!) she kept trying to climb on it and slide back down, a trifle hard when I am in the chair with a drill going in my mouth!! I only needed one filling and a scrape though so it wasn’t too bad. My mum’s recovering well from her hip replacement and is enjoying her time off work. I get to see her quite a bit now as she is home from work and I visit on my days off. Amelia likes to use nan’s crutches… it’s amusing. Anyway I think I might go watch a movie or something now, my flu is making me very lethargic. Until next time folks!

